Yikes! Gotta have THE TALK already!
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| Wed, 10-05-2005 - 2:35pm |
First Date and I think I already have to have THE TALK.
Here's the link to my Dating Diary that'll give you the background on this:
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-rldatediary&msg=4.16
Last night we spoke to hammer out the specifics of our date tonight. I was a little put off by his leaving it up to me, but I was prepared and had a restaurant followed by a cafe/art gallery scenario so we could just talk and get to know each other better.
It was late so the convo was short. Before he hung up he asked if I was free on Friday, I said yes then he asked me if I wanted to come over to his place and watch a movie. I actually agreed (I know this is something we discourage here) because we had talked about hanging out and watching movies as a good date night, though I didn't expect it so soon. My instincts say that it would be okay, meaning I have no reason to think he'd not take no for an answer should things get physical. Besides I could probably squash him like a bug;P
Now he did say two things that give me pause: His roommate would be out of town AND he asked me what time I needed to be at work Saturday morning. Ya think he's hopin' for some action? LOL.
So tonight I've gotta lay out my new dating strategy and I've never done this before. How do you do this? No sex until exclusivity. No exclusivity until we have had MANY dates and feel we're on the same page relationship wise. I also think I need to suggest we go to a movie instead.
I'm one of those women who have only dated guys I've felt that immediate chemistry with and of course had sex too soon. Needless to say those relationships were doomed.
Those of you who've done this, help me out here. How do I bring this up?
I'm really going outside my box here with this one because I don't feel that intense physical attraction, so I feel like I could progress with this one slowly and maybe do this right for a change.
Edited 10/5/2005 3:13 pm ET by cheleinsf


I would reschedule the date to something that does NOT involve going to his house, so that you don't have to bring it up yet...it's too soon for him to put you in that position, IMO.
And I would be VERY put off by his assumptions.
Sheri