You guys, I need your help! WTF????
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| Sun, 10-16-2005 - 8:17am |
Here's the story: Last night I went out on a date with my current beau from Match. We've seen each other 7 or 8 times now. We've connected and clicked in ways that I never thought possible. We talk every day, and it's obvious that we have something very cool. We both have hinted to each other that this could very easily be something long term.
So last night we had a great date. We went out to a nice restaurant for dinner, and then to a haunted forest. We came back to my place, and hung out. We did end up having sex for the first time and he spent the night. We were up until 3:30am.
But here's the problem... this morning at about 6:45 he got up from bed. He woke me, but didn't know that he woke me. I laid in bed, thinking he was just going to the bathroom. But a few minutes later I heard my apartment door shut and realized he was getting in his car. I continued to lay in bed, puzzled, and then figured he was being a total sweetheart and going to get coffee or bagels or something. But, 45 minutes later, he's still not back. I got up, and realized there was a note on the counter. Here's what it said:
"Good morning. Thanks for a great time last yesterday. I woke up and couldn't fall back to sleep (strange bed syndrome) and I didn't just want to lay in bed. I took off to head back home. I will call you later."
WTF? My reaction? I'm pissed. Now, I didn't verbalize it to him, but I had plans of another round of morning sex and maybe go out to breakfast. But it never occured to me to talk about what the next morning would be like -- I totally took it for granted that he'd just hang out with me. We both had other things planned for the afternoon, but I assumed that we'd at least spend the first few hours together. He didn't kiss me good bye or wake me in any way. I feel abandoned. I feel self conscious.
How would you feel, how would you react? My first instinct is to tell him that doing that is unacceptable and rude, and that it's pushed me away in the other direction. But then another part of me is wondering if maybe it's really not that big of a deal and should blow it off.
It sucks, because now I am having doubts about whether or not he really DID enjoy himself last night, and if he's having second thoughts about us. Is this his way of saying something without actually saying it? Help!
Tobi

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But to get up and leave?? Do people actually think that this is acceptable!?
I don't think it's perfect, I think he could have done it better, but I also don't think this one thing is enough to dump him over either.
Actions do speak louder than words, but in his mind he thought he was doing the right thing, he had good intentions, and intentions count for something.
Ok, folks... I think we all need
I agree with you, dude!
Coolas
Hehe, the one night stand I had last year DID involve morning sex.
>The man spent the evening at Tobi's house and slept in her bed. The LEAST he could have done is waited around to make her coffee, toast or bring her a juice! But to get up and leave?? Do people actually think that this is acceptable!?<
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Well lets see if I slept at a man's house for the first time, I wouldn't wake him at 5:30 am when I normally get up to go to work, I would probably have to get up even earlier to drive home, shower and go to work, so I think I'd leave a note. If it were a weekend, I would have just stayed there unless I had things to do.
>Most men are not like this, and society has drilled
>it into our minds that we are to excuse a lot this
>kind of behavior in the beginning
Society (not even "FRIENDS") can change what has taken evolution over two million years to refine. Attraction is a primal emotion.
P.S: I've brushed my teeth using my finger. My dentist said this was OK in an emergency!
P.S: I've brushed my teeth using my finger. My dentist said this was OK in an emergency!
He said it was okay in an emergency, he didn't say it would impress a new girlfriend!
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