20th high school reunion
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| Sat, 11-25-2006 - 4:12pm |
Well, last night I attended my 20th high school reunion. I went with a mix of excitement, curiosity and fear. I went with some girlfriends from high school, half of whom are single, the others are married. I hate to admit it, but I was worried about how this would play upon my issues around still being single.
It was actually a lot of fun -- so great to see a lot of people there. Ethnic Cook was right -- no one really seemed to ask or care if I was married or single or what, but still, I was AMAZED at how many people there were married, had kids, the whole deal. As much as I really do like my life the way it is and know I'm very blessed, it still got to me. It starts to feel like this goal that I can't seem to accomplish for some reason. I fight this feeling every day, even though I know better and I hate the mentality in this culture that it's better to be stuck in a bad marriage than be single and independent...

i went to my 10th reunion two years ago and it seemed like the unmarried people were in the minority. and the ones who were married had that whole married people bond going, like they all kept in touch obviously and were connecting over weddings and babies and if I couldn't offer my two cents on those two topics then they didnt know what else to talk to me about.
overall my reunion was a little depressing for me. i walked away from it without feeling like i gained much from it because i really had nothing in common with a lot of the people i was friends with because my life is so different from theirs-- unmarried, no kids, lived in different places. then i did briefly speak with a guy i had a crush on during high school and who i think liked me too but it was always really weird between us because of that.. i was too shy and he was too shy... and then at one point he moved away then i moved away and when we saw each other at the reunion it was almost sad because we were both still single but seemed to have lost that connection we had in high school and i think he was a little hurt because i never contacted him when i moved back home. sometimes i hope that we cross paths again-- we both live in the same area now but i don't know, i always figured that if he really wanted to see me he'd track me down which i know would be very easy for him.
I almost didn't go. The only reason I did was because some of my old HS friends were going and they convinced me. I did reconnect with some cool people, and it was great to see my friends again. Overall, I'm glad I went. Even though it was a little traumatic for me - LOL - I think it made me realize how much I've grown and changed since high school, and how much more confident I am now.
You should go to your 20th. I kept telling myself that a) I could leave whenever I wanted, and b) I would probably never see most of these people again (unless I wanted to), so it didn't really matter what they thought of me or where I am in my life.