Another wedding issue

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Another wedding issue
5
Wed, 03-12-2014 - 11:37am

I don't want to hijack the other wedding thread but all this talk about bringing guests to weddings got me thinking that if/when my DD gets married I still might not have a date to her wedding!  Not that she's engaged yet, so there's still time, but she's 25, has had a BF for a  year and it seems kind of serious--they just went on vacation together (she said it brought them even closer) and he gave her diamond earring for her BD.  Now my ex (her dad) has been remarried for over 10 yrs.  I get along fine with him & his DW.  Now for someone who loves to dance, I probably wont' even have anyone to dance with.  yes, I know I can dance "alone" like girls do in clubs--I will do that with my friends when we go to certain places where there is a good band and men are lacking, but 1) i'm kind of old for that, 2) it's a wedding not a nighclub and 3) I really prefer partner dancing.  I even thought of asking a friend from dance class to go as my date not in a romantic way, but just to have someone to dance with, but don't know if I'd have the nerve for that.  Oh well, no use really worrying about something that isn't even planned--maybe by then I might have an actual date.

Avatar for sabrtooth
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-1999
Wed, 03-12-2014 - 4:19pm

I know this lady, not SUPER close, but her daughter and my Lolo have been friends for 16 years.  When her son got married, her ex brought a gf he'd been dating for several years, and she went alone.  She let that issue color her whole experience of the wedding, plus, her feelings bled over into the whole wedding party's experience.  However, by the time her dd got married, she was in a better frame of mind, and atho the "partner" situation was the same, she put it aside and just was happy for her dd.  The whole wedding was a much happier affair.

Just ask yourself what you would do if your spouse had died.  Would you feel compelled to bring a dance partner, or would you be able to celebrate with just family and friends?  I suspect you will find that you are just as happy dancing with your son, or some of the uncles or good friends, and that your happiness for your daughter will compensate for the rest.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2006
Wed, 03-12-2014 - 7:14pm
When my brother got married, my mother asked one of her nephews to be her escort. He was honored and took the role very seriously. At your DD's wedding, there will be many people there that you know, and as the hostess and mother of the bride, I am sure you will get my opportunities to dance. I wouldn't ask 'just a freind' because then you will need to make sure he has a good time and you will want to focus on your daughter,your family, and freinds.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Wed, 03-12-2014 - 9:14pm

I don't really think it's useful to compare how I would feel if my spouse had died because 1) no one would really know how they would feel in a situation they haven't experienced and 2) if your spouse is dead, you don't have to see him there having a good time with his wife.  lol  Seriously, it's not at all about jealousy of him & his wife--it's been way too long for that.  I doubt I would ask anyone I was not dating and I'm sure I'd be able to enjoy the festivities even w/o a date--it would just be nicer to have one.  I have one male cousin my age who does swing dancing and his wife doesn't like dancing.  Other than him, I can't think of anyone I could dance with who is under 80 so I guess I'd have to hope the young men would take pity on me.

Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Thu, 03-13-2014 - 12:01pm

Well, I suppose you could hire a male escort...just kidding.

Even though I don't have children, I would think that dancing at your daughter's wedding is something that a mother really looks forward to, so I get how this is a loss of sorts. I can certainly see why you'd want a partner (you want one anyway!) to dance with--it would complete the picture. But I know you're not going to be all sulky and weird about it, if indeed this does come to pass. I know you will make the best of it and still have fun.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2014
Sun, 03-16-2014 - 1:13am

Thank you very much Priest Ajigar for i never thought any thing could make my husband come back to me as his wife again after he broke up with me and left to settle down with another woman who never Knew how we both suffered and share feelings together in USA but thank God today i was lucky to see this great spell caster on a site after seeing a lots of testimony and good work he have done in the lives of people helping them to get their ex,husbands and wife renewing their relationship i was convinced and i contacted him and just in 3 days after the spell was casted my beloved husband came looking for me and right now we are together again and he is taking care of me and the little kids as his responsibilities and family.I advice today if you are looking for a real and powerful spell caster just know that Priest Ajigar is a very powerful and a genuine spell caster and he don't do dark or black magic here is his email(priestajigarspells@live.com)