The Aproach & older Men

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2004
The Aproach & older Men
26
Wed, 09-14-2005 - 11:39am


I Would like to know how ladies like to be approached?.
I have tried several different approaches and some work better then others.

I am an older man. I still want to have a family which means I am looking for a younger woman. When a woman catches your eye and lets you know she may be interested with a little eye contact, a few to many brushes walking past you etc... what is the best thing to do?
I try not to let anyone know where I work because that leads the convo in the wrong direction and I try not to let on about any of my financial prospects. (it just invites trouble)
What is the best course of action for meeting a young woman?
I am confident and rejection is not a big deal anymore...
Any ideas?

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Thu, 09-15-2005 - 11:21pm

I also grew up poor- lived in the projects for a year, then lived in a house where the roof was falling in.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2004
Fri, 09-16-2005 - 12:08pm

Hi Shyone,
I agree with most of what you had to say.
I have returned home and ran into some old friends. I was beside myself that they were still running around to the bars chasing the young ladies... I was like grow up, right...
It really made me think.
I did not conceder dating younger woman until I moved south. I know it sound stereotypical but, most of the ladies here are literally married before the are out high school!?!?!?!? argh.... I had set my age limit at 35 for awhile, then dropped it to 32, then 30 and now 25. There is a larger availability of single the younger the age... I have found that the younger woman are MUCH more fun... They are more willing to do spur of the moment things, try new things, etc... and I am not talking about between the sheets... lol..

Congrats on your teaching career! My sister is also an educator. A very respectable career.
Well I have to go...

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Fri, 09-16-2005 - 1:12pm

I'm just curious, shy... what's the maximum amount of years older that you'd go?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Fri, 09-16-2005 - 3:01pm

I prefer to date men who are 5-15 years older than I am but I do date men near my age and even a little bit younger. I do find, however, that I am drawn to older men. Part of that is physical attraction - I love salt and pepper hair. Part of it is emotional - men older than myself don't have the emotional maturity of a 12 year old. A very large part of it is intellectual - older men have had more time to read and form opinions, etc.

Now this is a generalization - of course some older men are sad, pathetic, emotionally retarded paople and of course there are some younger men who are really well rounded and established. Since I don't want to have children, I find that this is less of a problem with men who are older. Many of them do not want children if they don't already have them by their early to mid-40s.

That being said, it really frustrates me when men play around and then get serious about a family late in life and then want to date younger women. They have the ability to do that but it is a lot more difficult for women who have a tougher time getting pregnant and then take on the majority of the child rearing burdens. I am still well in my child rearing years but any older man who wants to date me because I have a viable uterus is going to be gravely disappointed. An older man who wants to date me does so because I am intelligent and articulate and pretty darned stable.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Fri, 09-16-2005 - 3:31pm
So you would go 15 years older?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Fri, 09-16-2005 - 3:54pm
I would date a man who is 47 (15 yrs older than myself) for sure, though I prefer men around 40-3. I have only once had a man who thought that I was not mature enough for him but he was truthfully a bit of an elitist snob and I think that his frustration was more with the fact that I am not a Stepford girlfriend more than my age.
Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Fri, 09-16-2005 - 10:56pm

You know what?

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Fri, 09-16-2005 - 11:00pm

My max age at this time is 36, and that's pushing it.

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Fri, 09-16-2005 - 11:04pm

47? Really?


The thought of that just makes my skin crawl.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Sat, 09-17-2005 - 9:15am

Just some food for thought - I know a guy who's

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