Asking men out, do you do it?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-29-2003
Asking men out, do you do it?
21
Wed, 05-07-2008 - 12:43pm

Having posted a link to that article from Single Edition the other day, something that made me pause, that it included, was a comment from a man in it, wherein he states "our dream as men is for a woman to ask us out, I dream of that time..."

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Wed, 05-07-2008 - 1:22pm

I also am one of those women who has taken the bull by the horns, so to speak, and been the one who has done the asking. And it never works. Ever. And I

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2005
Wed, 05-07-2008 - 1:54pm
Frankly, I'm too shy to ask a guy out.
5yrssm 
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 05-07-2008 - 3:39pm

I used to, but my experiences confirmed for me that if a guy is really interested, you won't have to ask him out because he'll already have asked YOU out.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Wed, 05-07-2008 - 3:53pm
I asked a guy out once -- in high school (and one other time in high school for the Sadie Hawkins dance, but I don't count that).

Now, I prefer for the man to do the asking. I believe that a man who is truly interested in me will eventually ask me out. If he's interested and never asks me out, then he's likely too shy for me anyway or has other commitments/distractions that prevent him from asking. Not worth my time to try and chase him.

AJ, enjoying life with C.

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Wed, 05-07-2008 - 6:53pm

I think that anytime a guy says he "dreams" of a woman asking him out, it has nothing to do with wanting a relationship and everything to do with his ego.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Wed, 05-07-2008 - 7:28pm

I agree.


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2007
Thu, 05-08-2008 - 12:50pm

and more, I agree with what he says that men, if they are really interested, they will find a way to get up the courage to ask a woman out.


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Maybe, then again maybe he was told you are seeing someone and respects that. Maybe he works with you and is afraid of harassment issues at work. Maybe he works across the street and you just see him and he hasn't seen YOU yet. (-; Maybe he told a friend he was going to ask and he was told you only date rich body builders! ((-: Maybe . .. . .


I think this is over thought. I get turned down at least as much as I get positive responses. I am single, so clearly the "works out" part could use some refinement. LoL I don't think it has a thing in the world to do with talking the bulls by the horn, I think putting 100% of it on the man is just a way to escape responsibility and risk.


If you like a guy, why not flirt a little, ask him to share a lunch or coffee, take a risk. Do so with a level head and

We in America do not have government by the majority. We have government by the majority who participate.
Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Thu, 05-08-2008 - 5:46pm
I have done it and it has never worked out. So, no I don't ask men out anymore. I'll flirt and hint and give a guy a lot of rope, but he needs to do the asking. I wish it weren't this way, it would be so much more direct if a woman could do the asking just as much as the man.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-19-2007
Sat, 05-10-2008 - 4:41pm

 Z

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2006
Mon, 05-12-2008 - 12:31am
Yes I guess I made that mistake this week. I met this guy on an OLD sight and had been talking to him for the last 2 weeks. We began communicating through e-mail. I liked him so much that I gave him my number after the third e-mail communication. Our first telephone conversation was great (We have the same interests, careers, both of us have kids and similiar outlooks on life). We talked for over 2 hours. During this conversation he asked me out. Since I was going out of town for the weekend I told him I would not be available. The next morning he texted me saying that he had a good time talking to me and was anxious to meet me when I got back. While out of town I sent him a friendly text reminding him that I would be back by Monday. He asked me out for the day after I returned. For our first date we had coffee and talked.

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