BAD set up... want a good laugh?
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| Sat, 04-14-2007 - 4:15pm |
Okay there are BAD dates and there are BAD dates, this is seriously one of the top three WORST fixups I have ever been on.
My friend's husband PUSHED me to go out with this guy, not for a few weeks, but for a year. I think since my ex and I broke up I was a bit vulnerable--- and based on the fact that I heard this guy was in his mid 40's and never married--- had nixed him a year ago. When does "no" not mean no?
But, he kept INSISTING that this guy was a "quality" guy. He told me he was VERY successful attractive, wants to get married and have a family. He wanted to set me up, even though he didn't know if he was single--- so this was Dave pushing me to go out with him, not even the other way around.
I said, well as long as he's not like 47, okay. Well this guy was 47--- and I trully believe a virgin. No joke--- MAYBE he had sex a few times in his life, but I would put a bet down on his virginity. Something wasn't right with this guy.
First off, we spoke on the phone--- the guy has never even been CLOSE to getting married. So I knew, this was a bust but I just tried to meet him for coffee so Icould report that I met him back to Dave. I honestly expected him to dorky, but not THIS bad.
Okay, then I suggested we meet for coffee---he said he had to do "his fantasy baseball league" first but he would call me back if he could. So, I went downstairs to do my laundry--- I came back 25 minutes later--- he had called--- not once, but THREE times wondering where I was. The first time, he kept saying "hello, hello? Hello"--- For two minutes on my answering machine. Apparently he didn't know difference between live and an answering machine??? Then a minute later he was like "I thought we were going out where did you go?" The third, he called me on my cell (which was listed on my machine in case you need to get a hold of me right away). Uh... yeah!
Okay, upon meeting this person--- he looks his age---47. Which is probably the best compliment I could give him. He was obese (40-50 lbs. overweight) ---- and not well groomed. He had on these weird jeans with a belt that showed off his egg shaped body.
(Just to give you guys I picture, I run marathons, am a size 4, well educated, age 35, and I've had a serious relationships before)
We went to a bar (my suggestion) because Starbucks was packed. I found out that he had financial problems (even though he came here in '83 he was still renting until 4 years ago)--- he told me that he couldn't afford to buy a one bedroom condo until a few years ago. He then told me how he rented a cheap apartment from an old lady and how she wouldn't cash his checks--- and when she did it would over draft his account--- because he didn't know how to balance his checkbook! He has clearly has financial problems.
He kept apologzing for wearing "not a brown jacket" since I guess he told me that he would be wearing a brown one. He sweated profusely as well.
I asked him about relationships--- like I said 47 never married--- he told me that he has never been close. The longest relationship he's been in (which I don't even believe him) is "A year, maybe a year and a quarter." (who says that? a year and a quarter???) He told me that he's met women that are not interested in him, or vise versa. Clearly, he's never had a serious girlfriend. (I still believe the guy is a virgin!)--- he's got financial issues, he's not athletic (buy hey he is a GREAT bridge player), he's never traveled to Europe, he's completely unattractive and doesn't know how to groom (needed a hair cut, shave, wadrobe makeover)--- oh and the best--- that part that Dave tried to sell me the most--- he wants children. SO when I asked him he tells me he feels he's too old to have kids--- and wait it gets better--- he is SO desperate to meet someone--- that he doesn't care if they want kids or not--- he just needs "to meet someone to have a companion"--- WHAT ON EARTH about this guy is quality???
I told him flat out that the reason I was looking for marriage (besides companionship) was to have kids--- and if someone didn't feel the same, then we weren't on the same page. I am SO upset that Dave would even CONSIDER fixing me up with him! I am going to say something to his wife--- so she doesn't think I am a total bitch--- this guy has never met Dave's wife--- because I think she would say the same thing--- that something is WRONG with this guy.
I am just going to tell her that I am not attracted to obsese men, that he told me he had financial problems and that he feels he is past the age to have children. Because otherwise if I say "he's just not type" --- Dave will got back and tell her that I do not give "quality guys" a chance.
I know some of you just say to say "he's not my type" but I have TRIED repeatedly with Dave and I think that because he has a brother who is socially inept (like this man) and when he was first dating my friend--- he wanted to fix up his brother with any and ALL of her single friends--- and even she realized that her friends would HATE her if he did that.
Okay, I hope you have a good laugh...

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