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|Tue, 07-30-2013 - 9:15am|
I was watching a youtube video yesterday about the wife that throws a tantrum ( it is mind-blowing) and as i read the comments i realized that only people who have been in that kind of relationship understand the main question most people ask, why did he record that & post it on youtube. I having recently separated from someone with a personality disorder, i fully understood, and then it hit me... that is my baggage!
Any fan of 'how i met your mother' should remember the baggage show... how we all carry around baggage from past relationships, but how many of us actually stop and look at the kind of baggage we carry and try to work on it or around it or at least acknowledge it is there and understand how it will affect new relationships.
In my case, even though i will not be dating anytime soon, i still look and sometimes even have oppurtuinities present themselves, but i now look at women differently, through the prism of " is she hiding some psychological disorder?"... and at times i see things that may not even be there... I know all the stuff about projection & self fulfilling prophecies but for now that is my baggage.. because of my last experience, even a small disagreement handled the wrong way is enough to cause major red flags and sirens blaring in my mind.. ( maybe i'm the one that needs help ). but I also take stock of my baggage and figure to use this break from dating to fix some of that, so hopefully the next person i date won't have to deal with as much.... but I wonder is there some baggage of mine that i don't see.. and how would i find out, short of calling exs and asking...
So i ask the rest of you guys, what are your thoughts on the baggage we carry. how do you deal with your own? And how do you deal with the baggage your date may bring with them?