Being single is a gift

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Being single is a gift
12
Tue, 02-28-2006 - 2:38pm

This was part of my horoscope today, and I thought it was a nice sentiment. I love horoscopes that are more advice than prophecies.

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"Being single is a luxury, because it gives you time to determine what changes you want to make in life. You can transform and rediscover yourself in any way you'd like -- you control your own destiny."
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It's good to remember this when we're feeling bummed about our singlehood (as I have been a bit lately).

AJ, enjoying life with C.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2005
Tue, 02-28-2006 - 5:40pm

That's a good one.

Usually, my horoscope says things like: "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush."
How very telling...

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
Tue, 02-28-2006 - 6:04pm

I always find those little messages to be total bunk. Cause being in a relationship never stopped me from doing anything, let alone discovering myself and pursuing personal interests. If anything, I got to do whatever I wanted and still had someone who loved me to come home to. It was 10 times better than this!!!!

Ok, sorry to rain on an otherwise nice parade. I guess it is a good thought.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Tue, 02-28-2006 - 6:39pm

It was a good thought for me because I have been single for awhile now and I am still learning to appreciate the space to grow as an individual. I was in a relationship for a long time before that -- I did grow and change as a human while in that relationship, and I believe strongly that being in a relationship actually helps you grow even more (especially if it is a healthy one).

This thought just spoke to me today because I have been more focused on my loneliness and lack of relationship than I have been on the beauty of my life and the opportunity for growth that I have now, in this moment. It helped me realize that having a relationship is not my only opportunity to grow -- that my life is not stagnant right now because I am not with a man.

We all take what we want from sentiments like this. I don't expect it to mean the same thing to everyone as it did for me, but I always find it helpful to see the positive angle in a situation -- especially after having been too focused on the negative.

AJ, enjoying life with C.

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Tue, 02-28-2006 - 10:18pm

I opened a Dove chocolate today and the message inside said "Trust with your heart, not with your head."

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-27-2004
Wed, 03-01-2006 - 12:38am
I'm starting to believe that being single is a gift actually because since being on my own I have had time to focus on me and take care of me like I never have before. In fact it's brought me to a place where I'm going to counseling and dealing with insecurities that I never would have dealt with in a r'ship because they dont' surface as much in a r'ship. I think overall once I've done the work on myself I won't need a r'ship period. I'll trust and love myself more often than not, so if a r'ship doesn't come along soon I'll be able to be ok with that. Of course I would love to have one but I think it's better to have one when I'm in the right frame of mind and I still have some work to do getting there. I have made new friends, started a new hobby and it's been about me, me me lately and it never has been in my entire life it's kind of a relief to be taking care of myself first and foremost. Here's to being single! For now at least, ask me next week how I feel and it might be a different story lol.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Wed, 03-01-2006 - 10:01am

Being single is certainly an opportunity for growth. I honestly believe, you grow even more in a situation when you aren't always thrilled to be there. It requires a lot more introspection and reflection. That can only be good.

For me, I know if I was married and had a family (two huge goals) I would never have been able to go back to school, changed careers, and found a situation as unique as my current adventure. I would be sitting in a cubicle dealing with high blood pressure or ulcers. Now, I have a job I enjoy and do quite well. Being single isn't always fun, but it isn't always bad, either.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2006
Wed, 03-01-2006 - 4:21pm
My Dove chocolate today said the same thing! I didn't eat it, but it was the chocolate meant for me, so the message still applies to me, I think. I'm working on trusting my heart.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2005
Wed, 03-01-2006 - 5:10pm
I rather not have this gift since I absolutely love having someone to hold me everyday and tell me that he loves me. You can try and find ways to feel good about being single but in the end and deep down inside everyone has a longing to have a special someone in their life.
BABY #3!!
 
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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Wed, 03-01-2006 - 6:00pm

I totally agree. I definitely have that longing and I plan to have that in my life again.

I just am trying to find silver linings while I am single, rather than letting myself wallow in depression over it.

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2005
Wed, 03-01-2006 - 6:18pm
I agree! There is a HUGE difference between embracing and wallowing!

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