Blind date advice needed

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Blind date advice needed
13
Sat, 07-05-2003 - 5:27pm
It's been a long time since I had a first date that right wasn't after work. So, I never had trouble decided how dressed up to get. But, now I have that problem. My neighbor set me up with a guy she knows from her gym (another cop--seems like that's all I find these days!) and I'm going to dinner with him tomorrow night. I have no idea how dressed up I should get for the date. Does anyone have any suggestions?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 07-05-2003 - 5:56pm
Good question. Here is what I do - for a first date at a non-fancy restaurant I do not get too dressed up because that looks like you're trying too hard - but I do choose something flattering, and I never wear sneakers. for example, I have a sleeveless black cashmere top that is not tight fitting but is fitted and I will wear that with a pair of black pants and maybe heels (depends on weather of course) - for a hot summer night, I would do flattering shorts that are not too short or tight - kind of like khakis style, and pair it with maybe a high end black t-shirt - that is fitted - so the emphasis is not on trendy or dressy but flattering - also men like clothing that looks like it comes off easily so don't do lots of tiny buttons or complicated bows, etc. ;-)I also don't overdo jewelry or makeup but I try to get to the restaurant a little early so I can freshen up in the ladies' room and then take a seat and "pose" in a relaxed way - i don't want him t see me rush in with my hair in a scrunchy, etc. When we walk to the table I walk in front of him, walk tall and assertively.

Hope this helped!

Avatar for cl_shywon
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Registered: 03-20-2003
Sat, 07-05-2003 - 5:57pm
I always have a hard time getting dressed too. Do you know where you're going for dinner? Around here, there's not much choice, and I prefer to go somewhere casual, so I try to go with a flexible outfit. I don't think I've ever worn a skirt on a date, but capris are my fall back when it's warmer. Depending on how tall he is, I'll either wear my sandals (they have a heel..makes me two inches taller..woohoo!!) or some other slip on shoe. I try to find some middle ground, because I don't want to feel underdressed or overdressed, which is, of course, everyone's fear!

Good luck! And you MUST report back with details!

Avatar for schnappsers
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 07-05-2003 - 8:47pm
Thanks Shy and Deena. I had already picked a stretchy white lace shirt that's fitted and flattering, but I had no idea what to wear with it. I wish I owned some capris. They would be perfect! I may need to go shopping tomorrow. I guess if I don't find anything, I'll go with jeans, but they may be too warm, since it has been in the 90s here. Would a denim skirt look casual enough?

I didn't realize until today how much easier it is to have a first date after work than on the weekends. Clothing choices are much simpler on work days. I'll have to keep that in mind for next time!

Don't worry, Shy, I'll give you the details of how it goes. Did I mention that I met another guy out on Thursday night? You'll never guess what that one does for a living ;)

Avatar for schnappsers
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 07-06-2003 - 10:38pm
Here's my report, as requested.....

He picked me up exactly on time (I only let him pick me up because he's a friend of my neighbor) and we went out to dinner. He opened every door, including the car door, and was very good about asking me about myself and not just talking about himself. He didn't have that attitude I've come to expect from cops, based on my experience with DC cops lately (this guy works for Montgomery County, MD). He didn't try to act tough and make himself sound overly important. He seems really nice and is attractive, but (you had to know that was coming!), there was no spark. He's someone I know I should like, because he's got lots of good qualities. He was clearly interested in me, but of course, I wasn't really interested in him. If he calls again, I think I'll give him another chance, just to make sure I've spent enough time with him to know what he's really like.

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Mon, 07-07-2003 - 12:31am
Well, darn again. What is it with those sparks???? We all know they are flying around, out there, but catching them is the hardest thing. I think going out with him again is a good thing. You never know- the second date could bring something you don't expect!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Mon, 07-07-2003 - 6:30am
Hey Shy...

Sparks? If you happen to find a couple, would you mind catching and sending them my way please? I need just a few more...

And some courage pills, if you happen to knoww where they can be had...

summer 2010 sig by Tara

Avatar for schnappsers
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-07-2003 - 9:36am
I think my neighbor confused me with someone else she's trying to fix up. She thought I liked bald men (which I really dislike!) and she told this guy that. So, his very short hair (which would have been OK) became no hair. Perhaps that's what made me not interested. But, now knowing that, I find it a little weird that he'd shave his head thinking some woman he'd never met before would like it. I feel bad that he did it (as does my neighbor and she's going to find a way to tell him she was wrong). I guess I'll still give him that second chance, but this hair thing (not the length of it, but the fact that he changed it when meeting me) is really going to bother me.

I'm still supposed to meet another guy (this one's not a cop--gotta have a little variety ;) that my neighbor is setting me up with. We'll see if that goes better. Plus, I'm still holding out hope that the guy I met on Thursday night might call me, even though I know he's not my type...there was just something about him that I found irresistible!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2003
Mon, 07-07-2003 - 9:05pm
What's wrong with dating a cop? I like them myself.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Tue, 07-08-2003 - 3:11am
I could never see what was wrong with wearing a shirt and jeans to a first date. I guess that's why I don't get many 2nd dates. :-)

summer 2010 sig by Tara

Avatar for schnappsers
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 07-08-2003 - 9:28am
There's nothing wrong with it, but it seems that every new guy I meet these days is a cop.

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