I don't know if you can control what mood you're in from the get-go, but I think if you feel like you look good and act confident, you get beeter results, as you saw.
So, my suggestion would be, even when you don't feel like it, take the time and energy to put forth the effort, and you'll be put in a better mood by the results you get. The ends are worth the means, you know?
Confident, happy people give off a certain air, and that makes other people respond in kind. Fake it, even when you don't feel it, and you WILL feel it by the end of the day.
It can be a mental workout to put yourself in a better mood/frame of mind when you don't wake up that way, but I do believe it's possible. For me, it's always helpful to identify what has put me in a bad mood (lately, it's always my job) and then talk myself through that. It helps to separate the source of frustration from how you feel in your entire life.
Let me explain -- my job is incredibly stressful right now. I've been ticked off at my boss. I feel less than perfect in terms of skills, etc. BUT, my job does not define who I am as a person. Just because I had a bad work day does not mean I am a bad person. Once I make a mental note of that, it is much easier to feel good about myself, give off a confiudent vibe, etc.
I agree. Sometimes you have to fake it and force yourself to remember all the reasons you should be in a good mood. I don't think you should do it to the point where you're ignoring your real feelings but sometimes getting out of a bad mood isn't that difficult.
If you're like me, sometimes you get caught up in one little thing, like an argument with a friend, and it's all you can think about. I really have to try but I can usually put something aside long enough to look at the bigger picture. Doing that atually helps me wake up in a good mood most of the time.
And, the others are right, people notice other people that look like they're in a good mood. I know I do.
I think we can control our happiness to a degree. I myself battle regularly with depression (it runs in my family). Sometimes I'm just in a bit of a funk and need to remind myself of all I have to be happy about and it usually improves my mood within the hour - I think about the last really great thing that happened to me, or about my new nephew, or about how well I've been eating lately and getting healtheir. Other times I'm very depressed and I just can't fake it at all - I just need a good cry and to hide from the world for an afternoon or night. I think that if you really, really aren't in the mood to fake it, don't because then you'll get frustrated with yourself and feel worse. But if you're only in a bit of a snit then I think you should try to get yourself out of it because in the long run you'll feel better about yourself.
Sorry you couldn't find a new comforter. Faking it isn't as hard as it seems... I think once you do it for a little while, suddenly you aren't faking it anymore, and you ARE actually in a better mood, you know?
I'm not saying fake it all the time, people have moods and get upset, but if there's a certain thing that you know has set you off, try to set it aside. Knowing that you're squinting because of your contacts, for instance, is a great start, because it's something you're conscious of. Once you stop squinting, you look more accessible.
I get angry in traffic, and that can carry over once I've parked and have made my way into the store. Knowing that, I have to start out by faking it, but it doesn't take long before I'm not faking it anymore, and am actually happy again. I forget (even if it's just temporarily) about my traffic woes and actually have a good time.
I know how you feel...there are some days where I have a GREAT day (like Saturday for example), it was just a good day, I was happy, smiling, in a great mood. However, Thursday last week was a different story, it was the first time in the 2 weeks since the guy I was seeing ended things that it really kind of sunk in and hurt, and it was a bad day. I cried a couple of times, I didn't want to talk to anyone, but I told myself "okay, be sad about it today, but tomorrow is a new day".
so, that's my new attitude. I'm trying to be happy and positive because I feel better, but sometimes you can't really control how you feel so instead of forcing yourself to feel something different, I say feel the emotions that you're feeling and embrace it. If you're sad, it's okay to be sad, if you're happy, girl, then be happy :)
Glad you had such a great day and here's to many more ahead!
I am somewhat of a "fake it 'til you make it" devotee. I often find that just behaving as though I am feeling good can translate into actually feeling good. Not 100% of the time, but often enough that I try to keep an upbeat attitude. It's much easier when the sun is shining.
It is possible to influence your mood in subtle ways...maybe waking to pleasant surroundings, like a warm bed with colorful linens, or fresh flowers in the kitchen?
I have to say that yes it is possible to control your attitude and your happiness. Dressing confident, carrying yourself confidently and doing it gracefully definitely influences my attitude.
You can't always control circumstances as I was not a very rosy person back in January and February. But I think realizing that things arent *that* bad and figuring out how to make it better or realize that it will get better is important.
I think surrounding yourself with upbeat, optimistic people helps too. Not the flaky bubble head types but with general positive outlook on life.
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I don't know if you can control what mood you're in from the get-go, but I think if you feel like you look good and act confident, you get beeter results, as you saw.
So, my suggestion would be, even when you don't feel like it, take the time and energy to put forth the effort, and you'll be put in a better mood by the results you get. The ends are worth the means, you know?
Confident, happy people give off a certain air, and that makes other people respond in kind. Fake it, even when you don't feel it, and you WILL feel it by the end of the day.
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Ditto to what moody said.
It can be a mental workout to put yourself in a better mood/frame of mind when you don't wake up that way, but I do believe it's possible. For me, it's always helpful to identify what has put me in a bad mood (lately, it's always my job) and then talk myself through that. It helps to separate the source of frustration from how you feel in your entire life.
Let me explain -- my job is incredibly stressful right now. I've been ticked off at my boss. I feel less than perfect in terms of skills, etc. BUT, my job does not define who I am as a person. Just because I had a bad work day does not mean I am a bad person. Once I make a mental note of that, it is much easier to feel good about myself, give off a confiudent vibe, etc.
AJ, enjoying life with C.
I agree. Sometimes you have to fake it and force yourself to remember all the reasons you should be in a good mood. I don't think you should do it to the point where you're ignoring your real feelings but sometimes getting out of a bad mood isn't that difficult.
If you're like me, sometimes you get caught up in one little thing, like an argument with a friend, and it's all you can think about. I really have to try but I can usually put something aside long enough to look at the bigger picture. Doing that atually helps me wake up in a good mood most of the time.
And, the others are right, people notice other people that look like they're in a good mood. I know I do.
Faking it is hard and takes a lot of energy.
I think we can control our happiness to a degree. I myself battle regularly with depression (it runs in my family). Sometimes I'm just in a bit of a funk and need to remind myself of all I have to be happy about and it usually improves my mood within the hour - I think about the last really great thing that happened to me, or about my new nephew, or about how well I've been eating lately and getting healtheir. Other times I'm very depressed and I just can't fake it at all - I just need a good cry and to hide from the world for an afternoon or night. I think that if you really, really aren't in the mood to fake it, don't because then you'll get frustrated with yourself and feel worse. But if you're only in a bit of a snit then I think you should try to get yourself out of it because in the long run you'll feel better about yourself.
Sorry you couldn't find a new comforter. Faking it isn't as hard as it seems... I think once you do it for a little while, suddenly you aren't faking it anymore, and you ARE actually in a better mood, you know?
I'm not saying fake it all the time, people have moods and get upset, but if there's a certain thing that you know has set you off, try to set it aside. Knowing that you're squinting because of your contacts, for instance, is a great start, because it's something you're conscious of. Once you stop squinting, you look more accessible.
I get angry in traffic, and that can carry over once I've parked and have made my way into the store. Knowing that, I have to start out by faking it, but it doesn't take long before I'm not faking it anymore, and am actually happy again. I forget (even if it's just temporarily) about my traffic woes and actually have a good time.
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I know how you feel...there are some days where I have a GREAT day (like Saturday for example), it was just a good day, I was happy, smiling, in a great mood. However, Thursday last week was a different story, it was the first time in the 2 weeks since the guy I was seeing ended things that it really kind of sunk in and hurt, and it was a bad day. I cried a couple of times, I didn't want to talk to anyone, but I told myself "okay, be sad about it today, but tomorrow is a new day".
so, that's my new attitude. I'm trying to be happy and positive because I feel better, but sometimes you can't really control how you feel so instead of forcing yourself to feel something different, I say feel the emotions that you're feeling and embrace it. If you're sad, it's okay to be sad, if you're happy, girl, then be happy :)
Glad you had such a great day and here's to many more ahead!
It is possible to influence your mood in subtle ways...maybe waking to pleasant surroundings, like a warm bed with colorful linens, or fresh flowers in the kitchen?
I have to say that yes it is possible to control your attitude and your happiness. Dressing confident, carrying yourself confidently and doing it gracefully definitely influences my attitude.
You can't always control circumstances as I was not a very rosy person back in January and February. But I think realizing that things arent *that* bad and figuring out how to make it better or realize that it will get better is important.
I think surrounding yourself with upbeat, optimistic people helps too. Not the flaky bubble head types but with general positive outlook on life.
Ruby
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