Church People

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Church People
3
Mon, 08-25-2003 - 12:10am
I have never gone to church on a regular basis. My family is Roman Catholic so all the masses they dragged me to were in french. So I don't really have much experience with it. The folks I know who go kind of seem like "pod people" to me. Please no offense...but they talk the same, have similar dispositions, etc. My best friend & I went to a pageant out in the "bible belt" region of BC, Canada for a fundraiser. My friend was so taken by all the good looking single men - she talked about joining the whole ride back. She was like, "what does it matter? when they say the word god it just means something different to us. all the values and actions are the same! and they look so happy..."

Can church goers live happily ever after with non-church goers? What do you think? And if its only a matter of semantics, does it make it hypocritical to go and "pretend" you mean the same thing? It IS true that our values and beliefs match but our definitions do not.

btw, one of the guys leading the songs was gorgeous...one of the ladies overheard me say that to my friend and she scolded me, "he's married!"...and I said, "so? he's one of god's beautiful creatures - nothing wrong with admiring the handiwork from afar"...LMAO...

I'm so bad sometimes...doubtful any church would accept me! LOL.

Go.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: cl_goroque
Mon, 08-25-2003 - 6:06am
"Can church goers live happily ever after with non-church goers? What do you think? And if its only a matter of semantics, does it make it hypocritical to go and "pretend" you mean the same thing? It IS true that our values and beliefs match but our definitions do not."


sure, if both parties are open minded enough not to make an issue out of their differences.

(and i didn't get the semantics part)

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: cl_goroque
Mon, 08-25-2003 - 8:14am
Well, this is something I go back and forth on. I do not go to church, but going doesn't bother me either. What makes me uncomfortable is people who are more open about their religious beliefs than I am. For example, the woman I coach with is very religious and prays before she eats when we go out. It doesn't bother me, but sometimes I'm thinking "Okay, are we gonna pray this time, or can I eat?" I feel like an awful person who's going to hell if I take a bite and then she wants to pray!

I think two people can live together as long as they understand each other. If I were dating a guy who was very open about his beliefs, he'd have to know and understand how private I am about mine. Of course, then if we had kids that would be a whole other discussion.

Good question, Go!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: cl_goroque
Mon, 08-25-2003 - 11:56am
Well, given that harmony, trust, and success is determined by shared values, priorities, boundaries, standards and beliefs in general - it is hard to make transitions amongst different religions, beliefs, etc. etc.

And the reality is.....take it from a preacher's daughter.....a belief in God and whatever doctrinal theories you ascribe and aspire to - are going to dictate what you want, what you pursue...if you're "committed" to that belief, that faith, that standard - despite all your "feelings" at hand.

Actually, when you see someone willing to step outside of, to ignore, or to dismiss or justify some particular and isolated portion of their faith and belief to accommodate their own desires and proclivities - what you're seeing is someone who's 'sticking to the beliefs" until it requires self-discipline or lack of benefit - and then they're able to justify bypassing them entirely. And that is the "biggest red flag" you can get - someone that claims one thing...and does another.

Erin

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