Confused about my feelings all of a sudden
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|Sun, 03-24-2013 - 10:36pm|
I will try to make this as short as possible.
I met this guy a year ago, due to circumstances, we could not be together and I really liked him, and I think he liked me. We would find stuff to talk about, no big deal.
Over time, for me, it turned from infatuation to what I believe is a form of love. When I don't see him for days or hear from him, I feel this anxiety in my chest and this need to talk to him, or just be around him even if we wouldn't say anything.
Recently, the reasons we could not be together are no longer present so the door is open. I called him out of the blue and we both know that things are different now so we could pursue one another. Like I mentioned, once I Talked to him, I felt much more calm and life was good. I was extremely nervous for the first time, so in a normal situation where I would have been chill and found stuff to talk about, there were some pauses, which were filled shortly after. The convo lasted about an hour on the phone and then at the end he said we should plan to meet up soon and I said okay.
Now, we've known each other for a year. We've fought, I've cried, we've made up (in a friendly manner). Not a lot, just normal. We became really close that way I feel like.
It's just a strange feeling to me because I wonder if because I have known him so long , do I see him as a friend?
When I thought I was going to lose him altogether, I was so scared. I cried and felt a lot of pain when I remembered him. When I finally got the guts to call him, everything was fine. He is normally a talkative guy, and even he seemed a little quiet/nervous on the phone. (Or maybe I just felt like he was).
I have never feeled this way about anyone. If I feel like there is not much convo, I will lose interest quickly and not want the person. In this case, if I don't hear from him I feel like my soul isn't restful. I constantly wonder what he's doing, how he's doing. I care for him deeply. I still imagine kissing him and more... We have never kissed... Just not crazy intense as much as I used to... Has anyone ever felt like this? Also to note, although we have very little in common, to me, all of our core beliefs abou t life, family, jobs, etc is spot on. The stuff that has always mattered to me, we are very compatible. Our interests are different, but for the first time it doesn't matter to me... Yet why don't I feel this intense surge? I am okay with it, but it worries me that he wouldn't be... In the beginning I felt a lot of that but we could not act on it. We've always flirted, fought like married couples, random ppl thought we were a couple... etc... Help?