Dating Someone Crazy or Its Me - Help
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| Sun, 07-16-2006 - 9:36am |
In March I began dating this guy and in the beginning everything was wonderful as usually hopefully when you first start dating someone. Well in the beginning he told me that he had been divorced and had subsequently lived with someone. And he was not ready to make that commitment again for a while. And he was not where he wanted to be financially.I was fine with this as we had only just started dating and things were going good. But i wanted to keep focus on my goals that i had in life and at that point i had no clue. After about three months things were slowly changing and was acting weird. He no longer was as energetic and happy, he blamed this on problems with his job and having to move out of an apartment that he could not afford on his own after his friend moved to another part of the country. We were in arguments and he said that he wanted to be left alone however, after a day or two, he would always come right back .
At the end of May we had a huge argument because i asked him for a ride home from the airport as I had missed the last train/bus for the night and did not want to pay so much money for the taxi. Well as part of his personality and relationship hang ups, he told me that i was an adult and i got myself into a fix. He has previously said that he does not believe and getting things for people, when they are capable of getting them themselves. The reason as with his ex-wife, he would constantly provide for her to the point that she took advantage of him. And eventually led to his divorce. So at that point I had enough and left him alone. I did ask for things that I had at his place and he at first would not return my calls and then he would say to meet him places and would not show up. After about two weeks, he finally brought my things. After that we stopped talking to each other. Well about three weeks ago i got a call from a phone number that i was not sure of whose it was, the person was playing on the phone. When I called it I was hung up on. When i called from my second phone I realized that it was him, the ex. Well recently this past week, I ran into him and we talked for several hours and things were good. And he was a gentleman, the man that i met 5 months ago. i asked what he wanted from me and I knew of the phone call. of course he denied it. Well while we were talking, i saw a picture on his cell phone of a him and a smalll child. i asked who it was and after a few seconds, he said that it was his son. Well this was new to me, as the child was about 2-3 years old. I then asked the name and he did not answer for a while and then said a name, that was the name i had given him as a nickname. So I don't know if it is the truth or not. We talk again a few days later, because he called my phone number but a woman was on the phone telling me that I had the wrong number when I returned his phone call, but the thing was I could hear him in the back ground telling her what to say to me. During the phone call, i asked what was it that he wanted and he could not give me answer but said a lot of our problems had to do with the relationship getting serious and he not being able to commit. I once again said, i never asked for commitment. Well he got off the phone and from there, yesterday, i sent a text to say what is it that he wanted, since he wanted to meet next tuesday. Well he texted back and said that he was now married. I am confused as my friends don't believe that he is married or has a child. I am confused, and know that it is over. Is there or was there something that I did wrong. Did I miss hints.
HELP, because after his message, i went into a panic attack and cried and still want to cry, because i still have feelings but know and still say i want to get my life together first before there is any mention of married. We are both 30 years old, so this has thrown me in a loops.

I think the best thing for you is to remove yourself from the drama and get on with your life.
Well since then I received a text message from him saying that i could pick up all of my things from him and to come to his friends job. Because yesterday after he told me, I sent a message congratulating him. Well tonight, he says this and I go to the friends job and he is not there and had no intention of coming. The friend says to me that he did not know that he was coming and stuff and that i should come by tomorrow when he will probably be there. He tried to call him three times and to no avail. His voice mail picked up three times when he called. So therefore it was another one of his tricks. His friend told me that he does not have a child nor is he married but he does now have a girlfriend. Which is a a problem, but I will live you know. i am hurt that he continues to play these games. i have left him alone all these times and yet he does these things to me and the drive me crazy