Decoding a comment from a guy

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-29-2003
Decoding a comment from a guy
6
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 5:39pm
I have a question about a comment the guy I'm dating and wanted some other opinions. We haven't been dating all that long..maybe like 2 months or so. We talk alot but haven't actually been able to physically meet a lot because of our jobs. Well, last night I invited him over to my house because we just wanted to chill and watch movies. The whole night we were pretty close...mainly making out and such. As he was leaving he asked if I wanted to "hook up" when he returned from his trip. What does "hook up" mean? Does that mean go into bf/gf relationship mode or does it mean go out again dating wise? Or does it mean going further sexually. I'm so confused. I would have thought that if he meant going out again he just would have said that. I've never used the words hook up so I'm sorta confused on what it means...lol. Any suggestions? I haven't been in the dating game for a while and all of the other guys I've dated were friends before so it was a little more clear cut.
Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 6:00pm

My rule-of-thumb is if I don't understand what the other person means then I ask him/her directly. Assuming, projecting, or just plain being confused does not create a great relationship so I ask for clarification and elaboration.

BTW even the terms boy/girl friend can mean different things to different people and not necessarily exclusivity too. So clarification of words/terms may be useful as well even though you *think* you know what it means.

Mark

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 6:09pm

Yep - I agree with Mark.

When he gets back and says "you wanna hook up?", you say, "maybe, what does that mean?"

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2007
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 6:11pm
In that way he just meant meet up again after he gets back.
Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 7:08pm

I agree.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-29-2003
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 8:05pm
Thanks! Now that I actually think about it he probably just meant get together again. Since I've never really dated anyone that wasn't my friend first all this is sorta new and I'm trying calm down and not rush into anything. I tend to get attached easily and I hate being single so this is a little stressing to me. I've never really just dated casually before. Anyway thanks for your replies.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2006
Thu, 08-23-2007 - 10:15am
Yeah, I've had guy friends that I KNOW I'm not going to make out with anytime soon say that to me. I agree with the others.