Do I have a problem or what?
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Do I have a problem or what?
| Fri, 03-03-2006 - 12:50am |
I wonder that. I think Im a likable, nice, smily, easy going, polite, attractive girl, according to people who know me they say that of me, how come In my 34 yrs of age I have never ever dated in my life and never ever had a boyfriend before. Why guys who I want to get interested in me, they are not. Im always chased could some time ago by guys or men, who Im not interested or men that arent worth it because they are married or only want from me is to get laid. Im not interested in those guys but those are the only ones that for them Im very attractive and interesting. Why I dont get the interest in single guys that are close to my age and I get along very well with them but they only see me as acquaitance or friend? If I have the qualities friends describe me how come guys dont seem interested in me. How I let the single guys know or them to find out (the ones Im interested of course) that Im single for instance, if in the case they believe Im taken, which is not true at all. I mean I dont want to pretend to be another person just top get a guy get interested in me, I know I have to be myself, well that is what I have been doing my whole life, being myself, I dont like pretending, but even being myself hasnt helped.

Hello and welcome!
Also, don't be afraid to tell people in your life that you want to date. Tell friends and family members that you'd love to get set up on a blind date. Take some risks. Also, you said that there are some guys that seem to be interested in you only for sex? Well, how do you know? I mean, ultimately that's what relationships are for- procreating. So yes, men want sex. But you may be making harsh judgements towards guys that are hitting on you. A guy may look like a horndog, but he may also just be attracted to you and if you tell him you'd like to go for coffee and get to know him- well, that could lead to something.
Also, don't be afraid to approach men. Check out some books on the subject of talking to people. Even being friendly to various people at the grocery store (not just cute guys, but old ladies too) will help you come across as an approachable person and help you build confidence so that you can go up to a guy you like and ask him if he'd like to grab lunch sometime.
I hate to sound like a self-help monger- but Dr.Phil's Lovesmart is a good read and may help you address some of your dating problems.
I agree with talking to random people in lines or at stores. I've tried to really make an effort to talk to the cashier or help people at the store if I overhear them looking for something and I think that it's helped me get out of my shell a little bit when meeting new people. And it's something that's easy to work on. Just say hi and ask the cashier how their day is going, or if the store is always so busy, or how beautiful the weather is, etc. Easy conversations!
Good Luck,
Trina