Do you ever have that restless feeling?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Do you ever have that restless feeling?
6
Mon, 10-08-2007 - 3:11pm

I feel so restless and unfullfilled and bored.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Mon, 10-08-2007 - 5:40pm

it sounds to me like you ran away from everything that reminded you of your ex. Now that you are settled into a new job and place, those feelings are coming back now that you have some free time to think.

Have you really even dealt with your feelings and why your fiance broke off the relationship?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Mon, 10-08-2007 - 5:53pm

I agree with kcole. We can move to a new place, new job, meet new people -- but our pains and hurts, and our past, are always with us.


It doesn't sound like you need something external to ease the restlessness. It's an internal thing.

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 9:09am
Yes I did run away.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 10:22am

Although my ex and I did not break off an engagement, we were planning to spend the rest of our lives together. I broke it off with him, because of how he treated me in the end due to an addiction problem I found out about after we broke up. Even though our situations are different, I can tell you that the feelings we're feeling are very similar. And it sounds to me that the uneasy feelings you are having comes with grieving and not dealing with it. The more you push it to the back of your brain, the more it comes back to haunt you.

I felt and still feel that uneasiness that nobody or anything can satisfy but it is getting better. I once was a secure and confident woman with clarity about life, now shriveled into a little ball of mess. Failed relationships can do that to you.... What did help me was my family and my friends. They have always been there for me. But I also decided that I need to see a counselor. Not that I have emotional problems or am mentally deficient, but it really does help seeing a professional who can put clarity back into your world. My counselor specializes in relationships and addictions. She was able to tell me why he did things and how addictions makes people act. Although my work revolves around me and the actions I take, it does help being able to see the other side of the situation.

I really think you could not only learn about yourself, but learn about what prompted your fiance to break it off. Nothing is ever as black and white as it seems on the surface. Please consider it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-21-2007
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 12:38pm

'... but learn about what prompted your fiance to break it off. Nothing is ever as black and white as it seems on the surface.'


You really think so? that there is a need to know why such and such broke up with you, and that nothing is ever black and white? I understand you have recently broke up with someone and it could be

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 1:15pm

I think you misread my point.

I don't feel anything is ever as black and white as it seems. Neither of us know the reason behind this break up and it's none of our business, either. But sometimes you have to really look at the situation from both angles, to see how things affect you. Sometimes, looking at it from another perspective makes you realize things that are never there when you are viewing it from your own perspective. I am in counseling right now because of my past break up. And my counselor has been explaining things to me that I would never have thought. It makes sense, I can grasp my hands around and it is helping me understand the situation better. Undserstanding these things have actually made me look at the reality of things and you know what, I do feel better. It was just a suggestion to consider counseling because I have recieved so much valuable information that has actually helped.

I am only trying to help and there is nothng wrong with suggesting something that has helped me.

Kcole.