Does appearance matter

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2007
Does appearance matter
26
Wed, 08-15-2007 - 7:03pm
I know this question can sound cynical and become controversial, but as a single guy I've been thinking very much on how much a woman's appearance matters in her relationship status. I wish you all had pics posted. Because I see certain woman and tell myself she CAN'T be single, which bothers me since I hesitate to even try.
But some woman have told me that there are "attractive" woman who are single and lonely, because maybe they're insecure or have other problems . yes, no?
Kindly elaborate.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-27-2004
Thu, 08-16-2007 - 6:16pm
I honestly think that women who are attractive and have their act together are single because of choice or because they haven't found someone that meets their standards for a life long partner because that's a tall order to fill. I think as women we look for a lot of different traits in a man before we decide that they are the ones for us. A lot of confident/beautiful women are single because they haven't found anyone they connect with and can see themselves with long term. They think highly of themselves and know that they deserve to be treated lovingly and with respect and won't settle for anything less. Sometimes it's hard for guys to be this way because of the way they were raised, society in general telling them they should stuff their emotions, or having low self-esteem. If you can't value yourself how are you supposed to value another human being.
Some of the attractive single women though have some insecurity issues and might have pushed a man away because they were high maintenance emotionally, looking for a man to fill that hole or are demanding etc etc...
I do know WAY more single women though than I do men and all of them are beautiful, intelligent, self-reliant etc etc.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2007
Fri, 08-17-2007 - 1:42pm
Ok but whatever! I mean what in the world do you mean by :<>
Your NOT making sense because your contradicting your self. First you emphasize how visual you are then you say good looks don't matter??!!
Plus I've never heard a woman not liking funny,smart witty! That's usually their most important expectations in a man. You've really confused me.
Can some women help me out here please!!!!!!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2007
Fri, 08-17-2007 - 1:50pm
Hi
I don't understand what you want to say. You're contradinting your self like YAYA. If your "attractive" then why won't men notice you naked in a bar? If you're
not "attractive" then why were men falling all over you in NYC?! Sorry but I'm really puzzled by some of the replies in this thread.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2006
Fri, 08-17-2007 - 2:45pm

>>Ok but whatever! I mean what in the world do you mean by :<>
Your NOT making sense because your contradicting your self. First you emphasize how visual you are then you say good looks don't matter??!!

Um, no, you're not reading her response right. Before you get all touchy and rude, read again. She says that supermodel super-good looking never appealed to her, which I also said. You can be attractive without looking like a super model, it's just a different kind of attractive, in my case it's "cute" that I'm attracted to.

And don't bite the hand that feeds you, people are trying to help and you CLEARLY don't want to listen. I don't know about anyone else, but this routine's seeming awfully familiar to me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Fri, 08-17-2007 - 2:51pm
I'm trying to say that in a situation where men can passivly hit on woman (ie, walking down the street while he's in a car) they will do so but when it comes to a situation where he might actually have to go up to a woman and talk to her, he'd rather not bother either because he's afraid he's going to get rejected or he's assuming that she's taken. Which often makes a lot of women feeling unattractive or invisible or in someway undesireable. So going back to your question about appearance mattering, in most cases, its exactly the opposite. And its not because she's intimidating or anything its just because others "assume" she must be taken. You'd be surprised to find out that the majority are not taken. So next time you think that...poke around and see if she really is.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2005
Sat, 08-18-2007 - 12:15am
Yes, there are attractive women who are single. I get compliments on my appearance all the time, but I'm single. Not necessarily lonely. As for the reason I'm single, the last guy I dated turned out to be an alcoholic who thought that drinking with his friends was more important than spending time with me. I've been on a date with a guy since then, but I just wasn't attracted to him. Another reason is that I don't approach guys, and like you said, a lot of guys will just look at a woman and assume that she has to be taken, so they don't even try.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2007
Mon, 08-20-2007 - 12:52pm
Not true...believe it or not...they happen to be every where! Not just in Hollywood!

Meez 3D avatar avatars games

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2007
Mon, 08-20-2007 - 5:17pm
Ok now I see. Thanks for elaborating. But don't you think you're being superficial.
Doesn't your desire lack substance?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Mon, 08-20-2007 - 5:26pm
Everyone has a certain type that attracts them more. Personally, I would never be attracted to the type YaYa decribes. Even if I knew that person were a fantastic guy, it would not work for me. Thanks goodness, too! If we all liked the same type of person, nobody would be dating! I don't find her superficial, she did not say it was only looks that she goes for. What she did say is that she is very aware of what she is attracted to. To me, she knows what she wants and goes after it. How is that superficial?
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2007
Mon, 08-20-2007 - 5:30pm
Because when you emphasize too much on appearance that's being superficial.
I always thought a guys looks don't matter for woman that much, but vice versa. If a guy had said something like that I wouldn't have been surprised. Do you get my point?