Dont know what to do..

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Dont know what to do..
Sat, 04-05-2003 - 2:36am
Hi everyone! Hope all is going well for all of u! I need some advice and I am so confused all I have been able to do is cry.. I think I am thinking to much and possibly making it out to be more than it is and I wanted your advice...

Ok I am seeing someone.. we have been friends for almost a year.. We tried to see each other previously and it didnt work.. I wanted more than he did out of it. Well now we are trying again.. and it has been going great..

Tonite he took a guy nite out.. (which I dont care at all about) except that he always comes over when he gets home (we live next door) and tonite he didnt. Makes me wonder if something is wrong.. blah blah blah.. I just dont know what to do.. A family memeber of his also went out tonite and I babysat for them... Well they came to pick the baby up and I asked her if he behaved tonite (because sometimes he drinks to much and wants to fight) and she said yeah but it seemed like a distant yeah.. but she had been drinking also..

She said they danced together and stuff which is no bigger but i dont know I know I am rambling.. please tell me I am making more out of this then what needs to be.. He means the world to me and I think I do to him also.. and I have told him I loved him but he has not told me that back..

When we split up before I was seeing someone in the meantime and he couldnt stand it.. I just dont know what to do...


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 04-05-2003 - 10:36am
WHOA nelly!!! Wow. This really looks like over-reacting here. He came home and crashed - don't read any more into it until you get the facts. So his relative was vague, she'd been drinking and she probably feels uncomfortable being pumped for information.

Do you have reasons to not trust him? If so, then you need to look at whether you want to be in a r/ship with someone you don't trust. If you can't get over whatever it was in the past to make you so insecure, you will cling to him or accuse him or suffocate all the feelings out of the r/ship. So do some more thought on where this is all coming from...cause it seems pretty harmless from this there must be more...a reason...?

I hope it all works out for you tho - it sounds like you really care about him. I hope he knows how lucky he is :)


Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Sat, 04-05-2003 - 7:21am
You need to talk to him.

To me, it sounds like you're reading too much into it. Maybe he was too drunk to make it to your place. You never know.

I also want to take a minute to warn you about the dangers of someone who drinks too much and gets violent. I've lived with that, and it's not fun. Before you get really serious about this guy, you need to think about whether you'd be willing to marry a guy who values his alcohol and gets angry when he's around it. Just a thought.