Family Hates That I'm Single.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2007
Family Hates That I'm Single.....
33
Thu, 12-06-2007 - 2:49am

Sorry if this is long, need to vent!


I ran into one of my aunts today while Christmas shopping. An aunt I haven't seen in at least 6 months. We made some small talk, and then the words "so do you have a boyfriend" came out of her mouth. Ahh yes, the dreaded question from any member of my family. And you know why? Because I can't go to a single family gathering without the "where's your boyfriend? don't you have a boyfriend?" questions. And then when I reply "he's not here because I don't have one," it's followed by looks of sheer horror, bewilderment, and disappointment. By every member of the extended family. Because I'm just shy of 25, unmarried, no children. The "this is unheard of, what's wrong with her" looks from them is getting really old. REALLY old.


I'm still young. And I'm the only one of all my cousins who didn't graduate high school, get married right away, and punch out a couple of kids just as quickly. Even the ones younger than me are "getting serious."


It's at the point where I don't even want to attend family gatherings anymore because I'm sick and tired of being asked that question, followed by the "we're never going to see a wedding for you, are we?" And then they cease speaking to me for the rest of the evening.


Seriously? That's all you care about? There's something "wrong" with me because I'm unmarried and without children at the age of

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-26-2007
Wed, 12-12-2007 - 4:59pm

I hate that FAMILY does this to us!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Thu, 12-13-2007 - 12:58am

Awesome post!!


I used to get "soon it'll be your turn" at weddings... then I would say the same thing at funerals. I got left alone REALLY quickly!!

summer 2010 sig by Tara

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2007
Thu, 12-13-2007 - 4:01pm
You don't need a ring on your finger or a man by your side (sorry guys for the way that sounded)
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-13-2007
Thu, 12-13-2007 - 4:35pm
AWESOME!!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2005
Thu, 12-13-2007 - 4:59pm

When guys get stupid about the whole farm thing, I tell them hey, when I ride my horse, I have 17 hands between my legs - much bigger thrill than you.


Few of them get it, but at least I get a big chuckle out of it.


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2007
Thu, 12-13-2007 - 8:35pm

You are not alone. I felt like I was reading a page out of my journal. I am 26 and my family acts the same way. I feel the same way as you. Nothing is wrong with me because I am not married. I am currently dating someone and my family has not met him for the simple reason that they run men off because they are too anxious. They come straight out the gate wanting to know everything about him, how serious we are getting, if he wants to get married. Then before I know it, the guy has run for the hills. I told my mom the other day, the next man you meet will be my husband AFTER we eloupe!


The best that I say is to tell your family straight how it makes you feel when they make such comments. I have gotten downright curt in my responses to such questions. I have also had

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2005
Fri, 12-14-2007 - 12:01am
Hello everyone. One time I was having lunch w/ an older friend of mine and I confided that I felt sort of "lost" since I was one of the "last ones" out there not engaged or married (and I'm only 24!) and I felt left out. He told me that marriage isnt really an accomplishment. "Any jackass can do it" he said, "really, what have you really accomplished? Its not even a real challenge" he then told me not to feel bad about it. Now going to college, thats an accomplishment, or something else. I felt sorta better by his conversation. When DID getting married become an "accomplishment" ?? Its really not. Sure, I'd like to do it someday, but I dont feel so bad about it anymore being the only "single one" left. And besides, most married people arent all that happy anyways =0)
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2007
Fri, 12-14-2007 - 4:46am

You guys are all AWESOME!


I appreciate the input, and part of me is glad I'm not the only one out there dealing with this nonsense!

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Fri, 12-14-2007 - 7:30am

When did getting married become an accomplishment?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2006
Fri, 12-14-2007 - 2:56pm

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