To Find and Attract Someone Special

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-18-2007
To Find and Attract Someone Special
Wed, 06-20-2007 - 9:37pm

As some of you may know. I am on a interested to get in a LTR. I would really appreciate your help on whether I am going about it the right way.

INNER GAME

After doing some soul searching, I realized that I had started to have negative self thoughts. These thoughts were not rational and I decided to just stop thinking them and replace them with positive thoughts. This has been a revelation and helped me greatly in my endeavor - however, I need to take things to the next level.

In an earlier post, I outlined what I think attracts a woman to a man. Essentially, that a man can attract a woman by making her feel great through the power of his personality, intelligence and appearance. This is my primary goal.

It follows then that to take things to the next level, I need to ask myself the following questions:

How would I walk if I believed that I could make a women feel fantastic inside?

How would I talk if I believed that I could make a women feel fantastic inside?

What would the expression be on my face if I believed that I could make women feel fantastic inside?

How would I act differently if I were the kind of guy that women dreamed about?”

Then I need to start doing these things.

My questions to you are. Is this a good approach? Am I missing something from the questions above?

OUTER GAME

Clearly having a positive mindset and a goal are important in attraction. But, looks are very important as well. Therefore I have set out to do the following things to find a gf. Let me know what you think of these. I will preface this my warning you some of these are a little silly, desperate times call for desperate measures, lol.

1) Having my teeth whitened. ( I accidentally typed in there have my testes whitened. No thank you my testes are quite white enough, any whiter and any girl I got serious with would probably go blind, lol)

2) Lose weight ( about 15 lbs) til I am very slim. Most americans would currently describe me as slim/skinny anyway, but I wanted to lose 25 lbs ( I have already lost 10) since I will be starting an intense muscle development program once I lose the required weight. I know from inquiring from some PTs that it is impossible to lose weight and gain muscle at the same time. Also the muscle gaining program will probably see me gain some fat so I should lose as much as possible beforehand to avoid getting 'bloated'.

3) Buy some nice new clothes/ shoes. I already have quite a few nice things but I could certainly use some new shoes and jeans etc, so I set aside some money for this.

4) Buy myself an expensive watch. I don't know why I want this (maybe it is cos I am a little shallow, lol) but I really like nice watches for some reason. It is a lot to spend, watch rtetails at $3800 but I can buy it for about $2200. I am pretty sure it will boost my confidence as well but who knows. Let me know what you all think of this.

5) Move apartments to a trendy area of town with lots of places to meet other single and attractive ladies.

6) Decorate apartment nicely. I will need to find a female friend to help me out with this one since I suck at this sort of thing like most guys.

7) Take courses to make my voice sound better.

I think that just about covers my plan. I am really interested to hear

a) reactions

b) opinions on whether this will help me

c) anything else I can do that I have not mentioned in this post

Thanks in advance

CM