Flings and Open Relationships

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2006
Flings and Open Relationships
38
Tue, 04-17-2007 - 8:33pm

This is sort of 2 separate questions, but they're somewhat interlinked. First off, I've been thinking about relationships and why I don't want them. Some of it has to do with that I don't necessarily desire to put all the time, money and effort into dating her, building the relationship. Some of it has to do with the fact that I don't want to put up with the inevitable fights and drama that comes with every relationship, nor the heartbreak and breakup that probably 99.9% of relationships end in.

But the biggest reason I don't want a relationship is because I don't want to be monogamous. The idea of spending all that time with only 1 girl isn't all that attractive. I'd rather have just casual hookups, ONSs, FWBs, and so forth, but a lot of you have said that doesn't seem like a feasible option in my foreseeable future. So I was wondering if "flings" and "open relationships" were a feasible alternative.

First off, I'm not quite exactly sure what a "fling" is. Is a fling just a really short, really fast relationship? Because honestly, I wouldn't mind being in a relationship with a girl if it was only for a few weeks and I could just move onto someone else afterwards. If that's the case, how do you have a fling?

Second of all, what does it take to have an "open relationship." Because I honestly wouldn't mind being in a relationship with a girl so much as long I was still free to pursue other sexual opportunities. So I'm just wondering, as women, what would it take for you to be okay with a man you were in a relationship with sleeping with other women?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
Tue, 04-24-2007 - 11:36am

>I am not trying to hook up with WOMEN. I am trying to hook up with G-I-R-L-S.<

THEN WHY ARE YOU ON A W-O-M-E-N-'S MESSAGE BOARD???? Why is this SO DIFFICULT for you to understand? Why are you not on the 20-something board or a craigslist hookup site or whatever?

Are you REALLY this dense in real life? It's clear to *me* why you can't get a date. Why is it so difficult for YOU to understand?

Why do you keep coming back here if no one here has helped you? Why do you keep asking the same questions over and over and over again? Why are you on a WOMEN'S message board asking about GIRLS??

WHY?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2005
Tue, 04-24-2007 - 12:01pm
Hey em - how's that brick wall feelin?


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
Tue, 04-24-2007 - 2:00pm

>Hey em - how's that brick wall feelin?<

I'm telling you - I have met some dense people in my time but THIS one...

He's been here since about December, he has gotten some, what?, 300 posts on this SAME TOPIC, he says that NO ONE has answered his question (he just doesn't like the answers), he obviously has NO SOCIAL skills at all, NO confidence, wants a SCRIPT on "How to Have Confidence" and "How to Pick Up Hot Girls," CONTRADICTS HIMSELF by stating he doesn't WANT to spend any money on 'dating' but then says that girls should like him for taking them out to dinner and they should sleep with him (HUH?? I thought you said you didn't want to spend any money and you didn't want "gold diggers"??), and on and on and on and on, AD NAUSEUM.

I actually noticed that a few months ago he WAS on one of the 20-something boards - and they gave him the exact same answers as he got here. So what does he do? He trolls right back over here to the Single Life board with mostly 30-something women and keeps up his **** OVER AND OVER AND OVER. And NOW talks about "having flings" and "open relationships" when he CAN'T EVEN GET A DATE TO BEGIN WITH!!!!

ARGH!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2005
Tue, 04-24-2007 - 2:35pm
Hey - if you want even more fun, there's a cat declawing thread on the morality debate board. LOL


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
Tue, 04-24-2007 - 3:05pm

>Hey - if you want even more fun, there's a cat declawing thread on the morality debate board. LOL<

WHAT??! Oh for god's sake - LOL!!

Okay I have to check that out then... LOL! (wiping away tears from my eyes)

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Tue, 04-24-2007 - 3:06pm

I am not trying to hook up with WOMEN.



I am trying to hook up with G-I-R-L-S. Girls who're dumb and naive and don't have a shred of personality or substance. Girl's whose only saving grace is their looks. Is that really so difficult to understand?



I hate to break it to you, but the dumber and more naive the girl, the less the personality/substance she has, the more likely it is that she's going to be VERY picky in the looks department. If you're "not that good-looking," then you're going to have to settle for the ones you claim you're not attracted to who are as desperate as you are. Don't like it? Sorry - those are the breaks.




Edited 4/24/2007 11:06 pm ET by countrygrlupnorth


Edited 4/24/2007 11:07 pm ET by countrygrlupnorth

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Avatar for cfk_3
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-1999
Tue, 04-24-2007 - 3:19pm
I really question his sencerity. Why is he REALLY here; for advice or attention?
Avatar for cfk_3
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-1999
Tue, 04-24-2007 - 3:29pm
OH MY, I thought sisfox was joking!? WT??
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2005
Tue, 04-24-2007 - 3:40pm

Oh, I never joke about morality.

Wait for it....

BWAHHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

Sometimes I kill myself.


Avatar for cfk_3
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-1999
Tue, 04-24-2007 - 3:52pm
"wait for it" ROFL