Good grief! Moving too fast?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
Good grief! Moving too fast?
Fri, 04-18-2003 - 2:05pm
Here's another update on the guy I thought I wouldn't become attracted to but now am!

We haven't had the "bf/gf" conversation but somehow I think we both know we're in a relationship here.

So next week he has an important event about two hours away from the city where we both live and his parents are coming to it. The event will be over I guess around 11:30 and his parents have got a hotel near the event (I haven't met them yet). So last night he calls me, saying that after the event we have two options - we can hop on the train back to our home city, spend the night at my place or his, and he'll take the train back out of town to spend time with his parents the next day...


We can just get a hotel room out where the event is (presumably in the same hotel as his 'rents!), and go to brunch with them the next morning (!!!) and THEN get on the train and get back home.

Whoa Nelly!

Not that this really bothers me THAT much, I mean, it will be nice to just be able to go fall into a bed somewhere after this long event. And if his parents are "cool" (as in, obviously they were hippies! come on, now!! shacking up in a hotel room with their son after just under a month of dating, under their very noses?!), well I guess that's fine. But it gave me a double-take!

then he said, "well, we could stay in a different hotel than my parents," but that just seemed absurd... so I just requested that we NOT be on the same floor or near them.

maybe this is because I was raised in the South by an old-school Dad (although a pretty liberal Mom). My Dad would FREAK OUT if this was happening in his household or under his watch. Not that he thinks I never have sex, mind you. But I'm sure he'd like to be allowed to pretend!

Anyway so I am going to meet my guy's parents briefly after the event, and then in more detail over brunch the next day, er, CLEARLY post-coitus.

I told him if his dad gives me a knowing look across the table I'm going to have to get up and leave!!!

Gotta say though, you guys, I'm glad I stuck it out and got involved with him. It's totally different from other relationships I've been in, as in it lacks the sort of supernatural, drug-like urgency that comes from desiring a person because they are stunning to look at and you want to own them. But I really have come to like his paunchy body. He's a fellow human to me, not some creature made of marble and silk. I wouldn't say that I am DELIRIOUSLY happy because delirium has nothing to do with this one (yet), but I am very, very happy to be with him, and happy at the idea of us being a couple!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-18-2003
Fri, 04-18-2003 - 10:55pm
Good Luck with what ever you choose. :)
Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Sat, 04-19-2003 - 3:22pm
I'm so glad things are still working out with you! Don't fret too much over the parents thing. I dated a guy who made a HUGE deal out of meeting his parents, and it was just a lot of added pressure I didn't want to deal with. Just have a great weekend and don't worry about whether his parents know about your hot sex. They're probably doing the same thing in their own room anyway!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 04-19-2003 - 3:28pm
Great advice! Gotta remember too - your Dad would freak b/c dads are like that about daughters...its a little different with sons, no? I am only guessing here 'cause I didn't have a dad...but I watched alotta TV...

Have fun and let us know how it goes!! Go.