Got her number but I AM SO UNCOOL!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2005
Got her number but I AM SO UNCOOL!
107
Fri, 03-31-2006 - 7:55am

Continuing on from this saga:

http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-rlsinglelovi&msg=6371.1&ctx=128

After the usual small talk, hesitation and missed opportunities I finally got around to asking for her number. But it’s not like I was suave in any way, no, I just blurted it out like an idiot...AN IDIOT!

I handed in my towel and she returned my membership card (it is in a small wallet with a bit of paper with my name on it). This embarrassing conversation is what followed:

Me: You know what you should do? Give me your mobile number, that way the next time we are both free we can arrange to do something.

Her: Ok, Shall I write it on the back of this?

Me: Yes.

Her: It’s a new number

Me: I’m sure you won’t make a mistake.

She handed back the bit of paper complete with her number on the back and as I took it I looked up at her. She was smiling, but it appeared as though she was embarrassed, her normally pale face was a shade of red. I put the bit of paper back into the wallet, said “Thanks” and walked out.

So, how did I do?

Is it worth pursuing?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2005
Tue, 04-04-2006 - 12:10pm
Well, it's too late now. I sent her a text and she hasn't replied. I know she received it because I get delivery reports. If she were interested, even mildly, even just as a friend, I would expect a reply. No reply means...well girls, you know what it means!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
Tue, 04-04-2006 - 12:20pm
LOL
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
Tue, 04-04-2006 - 12:21pm
She may have received it, but how do you know she's actually read it yet?
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
Tue, 04-04-2006 - 12:40pm

Been following this thread and wanted to put in my two cents -

I would be really turned off if a guy sent me a text message. Not that it's necessarily terrible - but he's got my number - why can't he CALL?

It's like the constant e-mailing thing and he doesn't just ask me out. That's nervewracking and a complete turn off because I'll view the guy as a wimp.

You really ought to be calling her to set up a meeting for coffee or something OUTSIDE the gym. Just because you see her at the gym doesn't mean a thing.

Set something up. CALL HER FOR GODS SAKE ALREADY.

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 04-04-2006 - 12:52pm

Maybe she has to pay extra for sending or receiving texts. I do, and I'd be BUGGED if a guy sent me a text without asking me first if it was ok to do so, and I probably wouldn't respond, even if I *would* respond to a phone call.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 04-04-2006 - 12:59pm
Not answering immediately does not mean anything. For example, I answer my messages and emails when I have time, not right after I receive them.... And didn't you mention that once you saw her answering tons of messages she received earlier during the day? So, as you see, she answers her messages when she has time. However, if you are so eager to see if she is interested, just call and find out. It is not that painful.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2005
Tue, 04-04-2006 - 1:01pm
emdeesea, the issue about calling or texting is academic now because I have already sent the text message and she hasn't replied. We can speculate as to why, but I doubt she was turned off because I didn't call. I asked her if she was doing anything exciting today as it was her day off. She could have sent a simple "Yes" or "No", but to ignore it completely is really saying something!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2005
Tue, 04-04-2006 - 1:06pm

Sheri,

I really wonder if we are talking about the same interest level. I honestly don't understand it when women say "It would bug/annoy me if a guy". Let's put this in perspective. I am hoping that I am not just "A/SOME GUY" to her! I am hoping her interest level is MUCH higher than that. If I annoyed her by sending a text without first submitting a written request to do so then I DON'T WANT TO DATE HER.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 04-04-2006 - 1:06pm
Actually, why don't you just tell us what you are afraid of? Be very specific. For example, don't say "It's awkward", but explain why it will be awkward.
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 04-04-2006 - 1:16pm

Interest level can change depending on the behavior of the guy in question (in both directions--up and down). It's not static. I can be very interested in someone, but if he does a couple things that bug me...the interest level will go down. It may not *disappear*, but it will go down. If he does things that impress me, OTOH, it'll go up.

And I'm not talking about a written request...it's just courteous, IMO, to *ask* if it's ok to text her before you do so, rather than just assume that it is. Of course, that would mean that you would have to actually USE the number she gave you for the purpose she gave it to you for...i.e., to CALL her and TALK to her.

Sheri

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