Got shot down......again.........

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-27-2002
Got shot down......again.........
Mon, 11-26-2012 - 7:28pm


Well, I've been out of the dating pool for some time, but I moved to a new area in Toronto........a few Saturday nights ago I went out to a pub.  Just chatting and socializing, but one guy really took an interest in me.  He had definitely had more to drink than me, but by the time I left he was holding my hands and asked to kiss me (I wouldn't let him - public place, people not really knowing me, etc.).  He wanted to "come over" that night - I refused, but he did ask a lot about me and took my number.

We had coffee a week or so later - he was actually quite nice, and as I suspected, we had a lot in common.  He made a comment that night though when he said "I"m happy being single" (he's 44).  I was actually  not going to contact him again, but at the end of the night when I joked that he liked being single, he said "Oh, but we can meet up for a drink some time."

I texted him last week and on Friday, we met up at a different pub.  I actually was quite done up - I guess I still have it in me when I do my hair, etc. (it had been a while since I made that "effort" to feel sexy). He commented on my appearance.......we hung out the whole night. Once again, the conversation was great. At the end of the night, he kissed me repeatedly (actually, not such a good kisser!! lol) and we shared a cab - him to his place, me to mine.

I texted him yesterday to ask him if he wanted to come over tomorrow night and get a pizza (we live in the same neighbourhood).  I got this response "Hi Mel.....unfortuantely I'm busy for the next few nights.  Maybe some other time? Keep in touch".  Ahhh!!! Not that bad but I guess he really didn't want to get involved.

Trying to bury this one and not feel rejected........just not sure that any men out there really want "girlfriends" anymore.........I think they want "girl" "friends" (as in, see you on the week-end, drink with you, don't have to meet your family/hear about your problems kind of thing).

Boo....... :(



iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
Wed, 11-28-2012 - 10:14am

wow.. all I can say is good performance and bravo for being the Devil's advocate.. I do it myself alot..


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-27-2002
Wed, 11-28-2012 - 7:11pm

Hi Rocklady,

Thanks for your positive post.  I agree this is a minor thing........I guess I resolved a long time ago to not get involved with guys in pubs because well.......they seem to not have a lot of integrity and they are usually after a night out with a full happy ending!! lol.  I guess I was just disappointed in this case.......the initial signs pointed to what I just mentioned, but I tried to string it out into something more.  Clearly, that was not to be.  Back to my original point!! lol.

The job has its challenges......I am working in direct mail for a publishing company.  My job is not that busy, but I get along well with the other people there, so I'm hoping it will progress.

Thank you again for your positive comments.  The area I'm in is fairly friendly so it's not too bad mustering up the courage to go in :)

Take Care,

Mel :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2012
Wed, 11-28-2012 - 11:43pm

This guy is probaby playing games,, making himself unavalable.

Either way, I thought you didn't like his kiss? lol

He may not be worth it since a kiss says it all.

Community Leader
Registered: 10-22-2001
Tue, 12-04-2012 - 6:04pm

It made me think of that song by D. Hall and J. Oates, you know the one about the "Kiss on their List"...;)... Youtube