Grrrr...MEN!

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Grrrr...MEN!
28
Sun, 08-12-2007 - 10:38am

So I got up this morning and did the first thing I always do on the weekends- I checked my email.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2007
In reply to: cl_shywon
Mon, 08-13-2007 - 12:48pm

Used to post here under a different name so have 'known' you and followed your story with J too all this time ago; now dying to know: have you replied to him?? Along the lines of...?? Sorry if it's too personal a question..
Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: cl_shywon
Mon, 08-13-2007 - 9:30pm

I did reply to him...short and sweet.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2007
In reply to: cl_shywon
Mon, 08-13-2007 - 10:04pm
I'm still not sure why you responded in the first place and why a few here would respond after a year of a guy doing the disappearing act. I get the whole connection thing but I still don't think that means he deserves any kind of response. If you had just deleted his email, wouldn't that have been better? I mean now he's rubbed the marriage in your face and other twist the knife stuff like "don't worry it'll happen for you". What an a$$. Is that the whole reason he emailed you?
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Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: cl_shywon
Mon, 08-13-2007 - 10:15pm

I'm not bitter about it...I think that's the difference.

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: cl_shywon
Mon, 08-13-2007 - 10:21pm

I'm sorry--I'm sure that can't have been fun to learn, even though you were semi-prepared.

I wouldn't have been too happy with the patronizing statements either.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2007
In reply to: cl_shywon
Tue, 08-14-2007 - 5:30am

I mean, honestly. Why in f's name would he feel the need to do this? What was the purpose of this?? To let you know just how great he's doing? Why does he feel that you need to know what is happening in his life if there is no place for you in it? Really, I say this: **** him to ******g h***, try your best to just disregard this whole thing. B****d. Sorry but I kind of hate him on your behalf as I really and truly feel that it is a very cruel thing to do - to contact someone whom you've caused great pain only to tell them that you're married and doing well and oh how the h*** are you. *rolls eyes*. Sorry.
Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
In reply to: cl_shywon
Tue, 08-14-2007 - 6:53am

I got an email from an old boyfriend about a year ago that I hadn't heard from in 25 years. He was my first real love but it was a totally dysfunctional relationship and he broke up with me 3 times in 3 years. In the end, I broke up with him, but it was very painful and I have not felt as strong about anyone since him, even my husband (now ex).

First of all, he always kept a little fan club of ex girlfriends going, and I decided a long time ago that I would not join the club. When I got the email I figured he'd probably emailed several other girls the same day, just waiting for one of them to respond.

Yes, I had fantasies about an erotic reunion (not a relationship, just sex), but I knew I'd never do it. I waited a day and wrote a polite response. We emailed a few more times. I always waited several hours or a day to respond (hey, you can wait for me for a change). But you know, it was so clear that he hadn't changed at all in all these years: still the immature, sarcastic loser he always was. The emails stopped shortly after they started.

If I had heard from him after only 2.5 years, it would have been hard. In the ensuing years, I have deconstructed the whole thing (years of therapy, but not just about this) and now I can just look at the whole thing like an archeologist examining an old jawbone in the desert. Time has not made my recollections rosy of him.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2004
In reply to: cl_shywon
Tue, 08-14-2007 - 9:52am

Sorry, Shy! I know that's never fun to hear. I can definitely empathize!


Hugs!

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