A guy asked you to be his Gf.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
A guy asked you to be his Gf.....
13
Tue, 05-16-2006 - 2:29pm
If you dont' like this guy, you should say "no", but what if you like the guy, should people say "yes", "sure"..right the way? What does that mean to a guy if he wants you to be his gf?

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Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-16-2006 - 2:35pm

Well, I'm going through this right now...I met a guy recently who wants me to be his GF, and I like him, but to me, it's too soon...I'm not ready to commit to dating him exclusively yet (and that's what it means to me to be someone's GF).

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Wed, 05-17-2006 - 10:51am

Usually how long is the good (right) time to be someone's gf if everything goes well?

When you are not someone's gf/bf, you still can date other people at the same time? I found out it's little difficult because if one of them finds it out, I am sure they'll get pretty upset. I actually had this kind of experience, that I dated two people at same time (just dating, nothing else), one side found it out (Actually his friend saw me with another guy at the restaurant) He got pretty upset, since then he never called me again..........

Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 05-17-2006 - 12:21pm

Kewl Sheri... keep us informed on your "progress" with this guy. How did you meet?

Bottom line for being someone's girl/boyfriend is exclusivity.. plus having all those cute pet names you call each other in public...

Mark

Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 05-17-2006 - 12:22pm

How long before becoming a gf/bf? I'd say when you don't feel like dating anyone else...

Mark

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 05-17-2006 - 2:44pm

My preference is to date regularly for about 6-8 weeks before deciding whether to date exclusively. I think you need to know each other for a while before you can make an informed decision about cutting off all other options.

I think anyone who gets upset because you're dating other people during a time when you did not have an agreement to date exclusively is not being very rational or realistic (and yes, I'm talking about just dating, too). It could be a sign of possessiveness and/or insecurity.

Sheri

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 05-17-2006 - 2:59pm

Oh, online of course, how else ;-) (I answered his ad on Craig's List, to be specific)?

He's a cool guy in many respects, and we have a great connection, but I'm thinking we're probably not a good match for the long term--there are a LOT of differences. He says I'm trying to find reasons for things not to work, but I think I'm just being realistic. He's very direct--he's definitely pushing a lot of my buttons ;-)! We've only known each other 13 days so I keep trying to put the brakes on and he's trying to go full speed ahead. I have seen him 8 times in 13 days, though, so I'm breaking my own rules left and right ;-).

We'll see...he's not happy about me continuing to date other people but I'm just not ready to make that commitment after not even two weeks! We do have a lot of fun together though...went to see George Clinton and P-Funk last night and stayed out *way* too late ;-)!

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Wed, 05-17-2006 - 4:18pm
If you really like that guy, then at least it's a good sign, it's better than always waiting for him to call or ask you out.....Guys like to be challenge! Let them chase all the time! :) Good luck!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Wed, 05-17-2006 - 4:22pm

That was what I thought so too! Plus he also stated he only wanted to date! Well, I kinda messed up with this "dating". I did something unordinary, which was I had sex with him while we were in 3rd date! That made things went badly and I was confused on what we were.......anyway, it didn't work out and I got my lesson!
========

My preference is to date regularly for about 6-8 weeks before deciding whether to date exclusively. I think you need to know each other for a while before you can make an informed decision about cutting off all other options.

I think anyone who gets upset because you're dating other people during a time when you did not have an agreement to date exclusively is not being very rational or realistic (and yes, I'm talking about just dating, too). It could be a sign of possessiveness and/or insecurity.

Sheri

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 05-17-2006 - 4:26pm

Ah, yes, not having sex until you've agreed to be exclusive makes things less complicated if you're dating other people ;-).

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-19-2003
Thu, 05-18-2006 - 2:28am
Why not give this guy a shot Sheri? I know a little of your history and if you don't want to commit then you can still opt out later, right? It's not like he's shoving diamonds down your throat right? Com'mon Kemosabi- what's the harm of being the other half ..or is there no chemistry there for you?
Ehum.. and give us the goods..what is this secret agent man like?
~Be~ just because inquiring minds have no life of their own :)

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