Guys my age dating younger women
Find a Conversation
| Wed, 06-27-2007 - 12:17am |
I was talking to a friend of mine who is 24. I am 32, but she just started dating a guy who is 31. She went out, her and her friend (25) and meet up with this guy's other friend (32). Now her friend has a date with the friend. This all happened after a weekend that we hung out and I told her how hard it was to go out and meet decent guys my age and how I was wondering where they were hiding. I was a bit shocked (and yes, maybe a bit angry) becuase I felt this was just the type of situation I am running into constantly. I am starting to feel like I am over the hill at 32. My younger friends seem to have no trouble and I look just as young as they do. My problem is a) being at the right place at the right time, b) maybe I need to lie about my age??
It's just frustrating how these guys in my age group are so hard to find, but for some of my (younger) friends they are falling out of the sky. I hate feeling this way because I know showing any kind of negativity is picked up by others, but it just seems so unfair. The worst part is I don't remember ever having an easy time meeting men (any age). My last relationships have been with younger men and it would be nice to date some guys closer to my age, but they seem to be dating 20-somethings. Is this a phase? It's just hard for me. Advice? Anyone has a similar situation? How do you handle being happy for others when things don't seem to be working out for you?
At 32 I am looking for guys who are the same age or older, but there is ussually a lot of baggage. Divorce, kids, commitment issues, mid-life crisis, etc. I just want to find a guy who is in the same place in life I am. Not still in college, not embroiled in child custody disputes, etc.

Pages
I'm going to take myself away from this thread because I feel like I've just misunderstood some things that people have been saying, but I'll just say that I was getting that impression by people saying that 20-somethings are fun for these guys to sleep with or good FWB's...I personally try to stay as far away from FWB's as I can!
Anyway, I do feel for you guys, don't get me wrong...but for what it's worth, you all seem like lovely ladies who are single, like many others, because you're appropriately choosy. It scares me to see how many people are settling for what's around, for someone who wants them and is "good enough." Maybe I'm just young and idealistic, I don't know, but I have friends who are with guys who have cheated on them and just generally treat them like garbage and they're SO much better than that. I'd SO SO much rather be single.
I don't know if I'd say easy, but it has been worth the challenege. We do have some issues bc her mom is not very happy about her dad being in a new relationship (new being three years, but who's counting :)). But that sort of thing is more an issue for my DF, than for I. Whenever DSD stays with us things run very smoothly. She feels comfortable asking me to play, assisting me with things or asking me help her with her homework (I used to be a tutor and work in the Education field). She has met my family and is comfortable with them, so that helps as well.
************************************************
For what its worth it sounds like you have it exactly right. Stay out of the wars, let him fight those. Don’t force things with his daughter, approach her exactly the way you do him, one day at a time. (-: You’re not her mother, so you just have to build a relationship a day at a time and let it define itself. Mine were so young, I became there “father”. It is amazing how things end up working out. I wish you the best, sounds about right, moms and dads are territorial with the kids . . most “normal well adjusted” adults get over it after a while. If not, screw her anyway. (-:
I hope it all works out for you, even if not, the experience will carry when you have your own kids. They are work, a real challenge . . but they are just great too.
Oh . . .DF? DSD? I assume you boy friend and his daughter . . just clueless as to the acronym.
Oh trust me, I don't plan on settling for anyone if I don't meet anyone I will seek alternate routes to have a baby whether it be adoption or your local sperm bank. But I would like to try and meet someone special I think I have a lot to offer someone, its just hard to meet someone to give you that opportunity.
Hugs don't leave the thread, no hard feelings I just don't want you to get the impression that I think just because men my age want to date 20 something women that I think they want "bimbos" on the contrary I just think it's because like someone else pointed out, it's because someone younger isn't at the same stage as me, marriage/child minded and I think men take a lot of liberties with the age thing, just because I want marriage and kids doesn't mean I want them immediately with you, you know? And I think this is what a lot of men in my age group are afraid of, so they date younger women so they have a little more time to relax about it. LOL
Smile,
Deirdre
I don't even think you have to mention it, it's not like I remotely talk about marriage and kids on dates at all. LOL
My mere age it's an assumption.
Smile,
Deirdre
DF= dear fiance (hold over from the May-December board I think)
Thanks, I appreciate the support. I do think it's good experience as well. Good luck to you as well!
Pages