Has Dating Changed?
Find a Conversation
Has Dating Changed?
| Wed, 06-14-2006 - 10:04am |
I am curious to the ladies response. I was taught on a date, to open the doors for a lady, to pull out their chair, to treat them as you would like to be treated, and to respect your date or girlfriend. My goal is not to make out on the first date, but to get to know someone. I'm not lookinfg to get physical right away, if the date goes well, maybe a kiss on the cheek or a hug. I hear others talk about dates and it is different than what I do. Do ladies still like to have the door opened for them and to be treated repsectfully? I'm not saying the guy has to do everything, and I know women are equal, but do you enjoy it when guys do things like this and don't expect anything ?
Plus, what are your expectations on a date?
Plus, what are your expectations on a date?

Pages
needless to say,i don`t care how SWEET a guy is..it could be an act..alot of times the biker tattooed guys are actually alot nicer than the clean cut perfect acting ones
Hello,
I'm old fashioned like Jules so I appreciate a gentleman. R is the only real "gentleman" I've dated, though the others really tried. The first time R ordered for me, I was taken aback but it was really nice (he doesnt do that all the time...usually at a more upper class joint). He always opens doors for me, holds my elbow when its icy/windy/stairs (really important since I'm so very ungraceful and unbalanced at times) and such.
I think dating attitudes have changed a lot. I think people are lazy, misguided and bitter. I also think people get into sex too early at times...its like that old saying Why buy the cow when you get it for free?? Sometimes I think we hold our time so precious to us that we dont make time for others, especially a potential dating partner...its as though they may "owe" us for their or our time. I hate that. I also think people can be unbalanced when it comes to relationships...its either all or nothing when it comes to balancing the importance of an SO with your own activities, work etc..and vice versa. We expect more than we give quite often I think.
Just my thoughts.
Ruby
Dating is definitely not a polite way of saying 'having sex'. If you are only having sex, than that is simply hooking up. Dating is when you actually go out and spend time together, getting to know one another and just enjoying each other's company. This can involve sex but it doesn't have to. Men take women out. Women take men out. If a guy wants 'hang out', that shouldn't always mean have sex unless they have specifically expressed this to you. Otherwise hanging out should be doing something fun outside of sex. And yes, people do still go out. Not everyone is just hooking up.
Also, it is very possible for a man to take out a women withno intention of getting laid. These are the more sensitive, considerate guys, like twoscoops. I've gone out of dozens of dates where the guy didn't even make a move on me, but still had a good time. Dating should not be all about sex. Otherwise it isn't dating. See the distinction?
Thanks for appreciating my old school dating views - many men don't. It's funny because I am not that way in most areas of my life. I am very easygoing with friends and kind of a party girl who likes to have a good time. But when it comes to seriously dating and looking for men that I would want to have a serious relationship with, I really prefer for things to be pretty traditional. A man who dates me will order my food in a restaurant and treat me with great respect while in public but, in turn, he is the king in my home. My parents were nothing like this and nobody in my family is so I am not sure why I am. But it's just how I am comfortable.
I'll tell you something, though. It takes a pretty centered man who can appreciate both my success and strength as well as my traditional gender notions and vulnerability.
Im doing well thank you. Busy with summer school, finding apartments, have bitter beer mouth this morning after having a few over my limit last night, and overall enjoying life. R just got himself a job so him being gainfully employed makes us both happy (though I really wish it was down here in Chicago so we could be together). Counting down to our next time together when his parents will be meeting my parents. eeek!
Thanks for asking. Glad to see you're back into a somewhat settled life and such after your travels. How's the knee going?
Ruby
Pages