He had my bags packed.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2005
He had my bags packed.
13
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 11:35am

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 11:40am

My heart goes out to you, Eliza. This can be a really good place to come for support - we have all experienced heartbreak and can help with advice and comfort.

My best advice for the early stages is to take really good care of yourself. Let yourself feel it and be sad for awhile, and then concentrate on the things you enjoy in life. Surround yourself with good friends and family.

{{{{HUGS}}}}

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 12:48pm

I'm sorry to hear that.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-20-2006
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 1:33pm

holy cow! what a jerk-a$$. I'm sorry that happened to you. But so proud of you for your positive attitude. You ARE better off without someone who could do that to another person (especially one that loves him and he claims to love). WOW!

And on a side note, LOVE your signature graphics! I'm a "No More Homeless Pets" person, myself!!!!

BIG HUGS!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-11-2001
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 1:33pm

<> - not something you want to see after a day at work. I think he had this planned for a little while, I hate to say it.

I don't think anything you could have done after your incident 4 months ago could have repaired your relationship. So don't try to blame yourself for the demise fully. Don't waste too much time on the "if only I had done this...", "if only I had done that...".

Take care of yourself. Spoil yourself a little and do the things that you weren't able to find the time for because of being in a relationship.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 2:12pm

It sounds like you escaped from an unhealthy guy. This is not a bad thing. Obviously it would be silly to tell you to be happy about it, but as time passes you will see how lucky you are to have avoided a longer and deeper relationship with this guy.

By the way, it could have been worse. A woman I had dated for seven months packed my stuff, from her house, in her car and was going to break-up with me at a restaurant. Fortunately she didn't do it in public. She waited until we got back to her house, which is when I found my stuff in her car. Now that was an interesting experience.

Hang in there and learn everything you can about your life, your choices of men, and yourself. Good luck!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-09-2006
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 5:11pm

Thank you all for your wonderful thoughts.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2005
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 6:12pm
hugs eliza.
listen...men are rats,fleas,amoeba's..but maybe he is doing you a favor. You said it yourself you were having second thoughts to begin with but never verbalized it to anyone. Listen to yourself girl...you said it so if you said it why second guess it and change your mind. PLUS..YES...two fights a month is bad. IF he is that controlling as you say...even subtley...you should count your blessings, stay with your folks till you can manage on your own. AND PRAY. OH ...as for that cat you got him as a gift...it was a gift to him therefore he keeps it. think about it...he got you stuff didnt he? would you give him back that stuff he gifted to you at xmas, bday,ETC? NO, so fair is fair.Good luck and GOD BLESS
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 7:00pm

It sounds like you've got a plan and are really looking at the positive side of this.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-09-2006
Sat, 02-11-2006 - 1:53pm

First of all, it was 2 fights in 4 months, not 2 fights in a month, secondly, I talked to him LIKE AN ADULT and we decided that it's best for the cat to come and live with me.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2005
Mon, 02-13-2006 - 1:49pm
Sounds like he was using that as an excuse to get out of the relationship. I don't know why guys are such cowards and afraid to tell the truth (sorry guys). I've been told it's because they don't want to deal with all the drama (crying, begging, etc...) that is associated with a breakup, at least that's what my brother says.

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