He has a gf, should I ask him out?
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He has a gf, should I ask him out?
| Fri, 03-09-2007 - 5:14pm |
I would appreciate any comments or advice you have - I am new to a big city, I'm 38, single, no kids. There's a new guy at work that I run into occasionally and we chat from time to time. He's not married and I am very attracted to him. I do notice him looking at me quite a bit and when he passes by he is always friendly and has a big smile on his face. I mentioned that I am new to the city, and he told me that he lives in the same area that I just moved to. He made the comment that he could show me around but he never mentioned it again. We haven't really gotten too personal, just small talk. I know someone (male) that he works with and he told me that he has a girlfriend. His comment to that was, "you have to put a wedge in between there". I have never asked someone out that is "taken". I'm not sure how to handle it, but I have to find out if he is interested one way or another. Should I play the "friend card" and just ask him if he's interested in getting together sometime and have coffee, lunch or go to a movie? Help! I'm not sure what to do.

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I would be pretty pissed if another woman asked my boyfriend out, knowing that he was already "taken."
Would you want a woman to play the friend card that really had ulterior motives on a boyfriend of yours to spend time with your boyfriend outside of work, to work him???
If you can honestly say you'd be fine with a woman moving in on your boyfriend than by all means do it.
Smile,
Deirdre
He has a gf, should I ask him out?
NO!!!
I do notice him looking at me quite a bit and when he passes by he is always friendly and has a big smile on his face.
He's probably just a friendly guy.
Forget what the girlfriend thinks, what about what the guy might think of you if he knows that you know . . .
Who knows where his relationship may be heading. If things do not work out between himself and his girlfriend, he may consider asking you out. However, in my opinion, you could risk jeopardizing that by putting doubts into his head regarding your morals/ethics.
And another thing to think about is your co-workers. What would they think?
Life shouldn't be about what other people think but I strive to follow the golden rule. Therefore, I would not move in on another woman's man simply because I would not appreciate it if she did the same to me ; )
He has a girlfriend, which basically means, he's off limits. How would you like it if you had a boyfriend and some single girl knew about you but still asked him out without having regards for your feelings? We never think about that one do we? If you do ask him out and he says yes, it shows you what type of integrity he has. And you can expect the same type of treatment in the future if you do hook up with him.
Forget about him and find someone else who is available.
Are you serious? You have ulterior motives that's what's wrong with that! Don't do to someone else what you wouldn't want done to you. And for the comment, it's happened to me before, you should know how hurtful that is to do to someone since it's been done to you before. Why would you want to inflict pain on someone else because you've been hurt before or because of your selfish needs? You're 38 years old. You're old enough to know better.
Geesh, are men that scarce that some women have to resort to trying to take someone else's man behind their backs?
I'm done, really, I can't!
There's a new guy at work that I run into occasionally and we chat from time to time. He's not married and I am very attracted to him.
Because of this statement you made, I do not think it's a good idea to "just maybe go to lunch or get coffee as a friend."
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