Is he into me????... :/
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Is he into me????... :/
| Fri, 07-18-2003 - 4:30am |
Hi everyone, its been pretty long since I haven't posted a message
on the board, i have to say..it has changed a lot.
Well I decided to post a message because I cant stop thinking about
a co-worker of mine, which I really like. He flirts with me and stuff,
I just dont know if his a regular flirt or if his into me the same way
I'm into him. Today for example I asked a girl that works with me, if I
should call her?...he immediately jumped into the conversation and said
I'll call you...but I stupidly just ignored him :(....What can I do so he
could ask me for my number. The problem is that we work different shifts.
But we meet when i'm getting out and when his coming in. We work late night
shifts too. I dont know how to flirt, or just let him know im into him.
Can I please have some input in this.
We doesnt he just directly ask me for my number?... I dont understand,
I just know I like him, and I haven't thought about a guy the way im
thinking about him for the longest.
Thank you for your time and please help....:(
on the board, i have to say..it has changed a lot.
Well I decided to post a message because I cant stop thinking about
a co-worker of mine, which I really like. He flirts with me and stuff,
I just dont know if his a regular flirt or if his into me the same way
I'm into him. Today for example I asked a girl that works with me, if I
should call her?...he immediately jumped into the conversation and said
I'll call you...but I stupidly just ignored him :(....What can I do so he
could ask me for my number. The problem is that we work different shifts.
But we meet when i'm getting out and when his coming in. We work late night
shifts too. I dont know how to flirt, or just let him know im into him.
Can I please have some input in this.
We doesnt he just directly ask me for my number?... I dont understand,
I just know I like him, and I haven't thought about a guy the way im
thinking about him for the longest.
Thank you for your time and please help....:(
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When I was 19 (I am now 36), I went to dinner with my friend and "David" was there (who barely knew my friend, and who I had never met) - I had a bad cold and was feeling icky - we met for dinner across the street from the day care center I worked at - and I pointed it out to everyone - three days later - withoout knowing my last name - he tracked me down at my job to ask me out - I had forgotten about meeting hm and he had to convince me that we had met - we dated for a year. A man who is interested - will find a way!!
I think your man likes you, but not enough to follow through. I'd continue to flirt w/him, but I'd also look elsewhere for other dates. This one is either involved elsewhere (which is what I think is the case), or too immature to follow up on you.
In either case, I wouldn't want him, b/c once again: why do I want a man who doesn't want me?
Ash
Make any excuse to run into him. Stay late so your shift overlaps his. Or stand in the employee entrance or parking lot chatting with a co-worker. When you talk to him stand close to him in his personal space, touch his arm when talking to him, ask him about his weekend plans etc. Tell him you are going to the beach (or bowling!!) and maybe he'll say "Can I come?"
And be totally on guard for those times when opportunity knocks like when he said "I'll call you" so you can quickly response with a "sure you can".
They say men rarely get compliments so give him some. "You are such a nice (or funny) guy" etc.
Good luck.
She's trying to let him know she likes him and would say yes if he asked her out. Of course you are right that being warm, sincere, and approachable are an absolute necessary part of the equation, but a few little extra gestures probably would be helpful as well.
Ava
I agree that my position was probably too extreme and yours sounds very balanced Ava. (and hope all is going well with your SO!)
Almost all of the people I know who are in relationships were initiated by the woman. If we waited around for most men to make the first move retirement would come first. It's true that all of us don't like rejection but it is a much bigger deal for men. Ever watch Dr. Phil ? He has 30 years of psychology under his belt and I learned this watching his show. How many years do you have ?
I meant genuine compliments are to be given. And I still believe they will go a long way in him feeling comfortable with her and it's a way for her to tell him that she likes him.
As far as touching, this is a choice based on the person. We make these type of choices in all situations everyday. I highly doubt this flirty guy will make a big deal out of a woman touching his elbow ! I didn't say "go to the Accounting office and touch the guy that sits in the corner on his computer all day".
I stick with my original advice.
what embarasses me the most is that you claim to be from NYC - I have lived here 36 years, 11 months, and ten days (28 years in Queens, nine years in Manhattan). Please don't use your posts to reinforce that unfortunate myth about rude/harsh new yorkers, ok?
I have never had to ask a man out or be the initial pursuer - I am reasonably attractive (no beauty queen, believe me) and reasonably intelligent and educated and have done fairly well in the dating world with my approach - but then again, I don't have the negative, condescending attitude you do. So please keep your rebuttals coming - very entertaining.
Just keep flirting if you want, and if he's interested, he'll ask. In the meantime, don't obsess over it, though!