He took the baby

Community Leader
Registered: 07-16-2001
He took the baby
23
Sat, 07-28-2012 - 2:10am
It's a long, drawn out story, but essentially my sister's ex suddenly decided tonight that he wanted the baby and came and took her and there wasn't a damn thing we could do about it since my sister is in the hospital. She thought she was going to get to come home on Sunday, but once she finds out about this she's probably going to flip and they may keep her longer. Basically, his family talked him into it and started texting/calling my mom saying they'll file kidnapping charges if we take her anywhere before they get there and that he has full custody and it'll stay that way until she's 18. He told his family that my sister kicked the baby and tried to beat the crap out of the boyfriend. Neither of those things happened.

If the sheriff's department hadn't been there (we called them) someone or more than one would have ended up hospitalized and/or in jail tonight. My mom is a complete mess. I had to hand the baby over and I wanted to kick him in the nuts. My stepdad is ready to go to jail after he has his piece of him.

And guess who has to pick up the pieces and hold it all together for everyone.

I'm calling to have them check on her tomorrow bc we weren't home and didn't send much with her. He's violent, so we're worried he'll hurt her if she cries too much. He's said he's worried about that too. Then we have to find a lawyer so there's a custody agreement in place. I don't care what his family thinks- that baby is far better off with us than with him.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-1999
Sun, 07-29-2012 - 1:18pm

So, somehow he got word to someone that he didn't want full custody and would visit the baby when he could...I'm assuming he's going to return her when your sister gets back...I hope that is soon. 

Community Leader
Registered: 07-16-2001
Sun, 07-29-2012 - 3:22pm
My sister called this morning to tell us she's being released in the morning. The bf called her this morning and told her he was going to bring the baby back to us last night, but then didn't. After hearing that, I was really, really hopeful he'd show up with her today. Then he called my mom to tell her he was bringing the baby back when he got off work. Then he called me (after mom gave him my number) and apologized and said it was all his family's doing and they were pushing him to do all of it and blah blah blah. I don't believe him. My mom does, but she still thinks he's a good person. I'm sorry, but anyone who lies as much as he has is not a good person!!!

I'm still worried that he's got something up his sleeve, but hopefully the baby will be back with me by 6:30 tonight. It's 2:30 now. Four hours is far too long!! My sister will be with us tomorrow. The doctor wants to talk to my mom before she leaves. I just hope they don't commit her in my sister's place! (I'm really only half joking there!)
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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-1999
Sun, 07-29-2012 - 3:45pm

Do you think he apologized because he wants to try and work things out with your sister?

I hope he doesn't have anything up his sleeve...

I hope your sister has been given some useful tools in order to deal with all of the stress... 

Community Leader
Registered: 07-16-2001
Sun, 07-29-2012 - 4:30pm
No, he doesn't want to get back with her, or at least that's what he's telling my mom. He could be telling my sister something different and sending her mixed messages.

I am not convinced yet that my sister isn't bipolar, but she didn't have any problems while at the hospital so they really didn't have anything to see. She is on an antidepressant, which she had been prescribed before but quit taking. Hopefully she'll keep taking it and it'll stabilize her moods like it's supposed to.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-10-2012
Sun, 07-29-2012 - 6:38pm

Just from experience...if your sister were any form of bipolar an antidep on it's own would send her into a manic phase pretty easily.    Bipolar need antidep AND a mood stabilizer.  

That being said, I hope she gets some long term therapy going.  If, by chance, she is a 'soft' bipolar it can be a lot harder to diagnose and for her to accept.    I wish I could be manic ALL the time because those are the times when I am happiest and feel the best .    I hate the middle and I despise the soul crushing depression.

I really hope the baby is back with you in a few hours.  xoxo

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2006
Sun, 07-29-2012 - 9:29pm
What Heather said. Antidepressants can make bipolar worse. I hate the manic phase too though because for me it means rampant paranoia plus not sleeping plus extreme irritability and occasionally unbridled rage. I was actually much more likely to become suicidal during the manic phase. There was no "good" feeling, ever. Because of that it took ten years to get the right diagnosis and the right meds.
Community Leader
Registered: 07-16-2001
Mon, 07-30-2012 - 7:02pm
Aquarius, your "manic" sounds like what happens with my sister. She does seem to need a trigger, which I'm not sure is part of bipolar. My mom seems to trigger it because she nags and nags. She's one of those rare people who never procrastinates. Never. She can't accept that other people do. And she asks the same questions over and over and over, just because she likes to talk about things. She can't let anything just go. My sister has been back home for a few hours and has already has told mom that her nagging is part of the problem. She didn't blow up about it either, so that's good.

I guess the only thing the doctors said was anxiety and depression. Hopefully it will help.
Avatar for cfk_3
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-1999
Mon, 07-30-2012 - 8:07pm

Is the baby okay, Shy?  I'm assuming she's back with your sister.

Community Leader
Registered: 07-16-2001
Mon, 07-30-2012 - 8:33pm
They are sitting on the floor in front of me right now, baby cackling. :-)
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-26-2011
Tue, 07-31-2012 - 12:26am

Oh, that poor little thing!  Glad she's home safe with you all.