HELP!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-13-2006
HELP!!!
25
Tue, 07-18-2006 - 4:40pm

Ok, met this guy online. Fantastic guy. Totally into me. Asked me to be exclusive within 2 weeks. Asked me to fly home with him to meet his parents. Wants to take me to his friends' wedding and introduce me to all of his friends. He's perfect. Except that he still had his online dating profile up. So I set up a fake profile to see if he was still dating girls from the site. He set up a date with my fake girl yesterday. Check this out:

Email to my friend:

So, I asked him about Match.com. He said that he reads the emails, but never responds to them. He said that he shouldn't have a profile any more and that he would take it down. He didn't want to have sex this morning because his penis was sore. I said I noticed last night that it was chaffed and asked why. He said too much masturbation. I did not ask if there was another girl - but keep reading. I asked about the panties I found pretty much right out in the open in his bedroom. He said that he wasn't sure whose they were but they must have been there for a while. I said that seems odd because I know his maid comes regularly. We've been together almost 2 monhts. He had no explanation. I asked if he'd been with anyone since we'd decided to be exclusive. He said no. I said he seemed like he was mad that I was asking these questions. HE SAID no, I had a right to ask those questions because I'M HIS GIRLFRIEND. I said I believed him and that I just needed to ask and I hoped he understood. I said I hope things wouldn't be weird because of those conversations and asked "we're fine, right?" he said yes. He walked me out to my car and I said, "I just want you to know that I like you very much." He said "I like you very much too." I said, "And I think we have great chemistry." HE SAID, "I THINK WE HAVE GREAT CHEMISTRY." He is planning to take me to his friend's wedding this weekend and wants me to meet his friends. Remember, this is the set-up.

Then I get into the office (the SAME morning, as in, immediately after the above conversation with me) and he's already emailed fake-girl. Here's what he said:

Hey, can we make it a little earlier tonite? I'm still jet-lagged and I was exhausted at 6 last night (still 10 hours ahead). Maybe 7:00?

Billy

Also, here's the item:

To: Fake Girl:

To answer your questions, I've met about 15 people in person over the course of about 8 months (I was on last year for about 4 months and I went back on about 4 months ago -- I'll explain tomorrow). All have been very nice but just NO CHEMISTRY. And they never look like their pictures! I HAVE NOT DATED ANYONE I'VE MET so no success stories yet. And you?

Billy

Then, to be even more contradictory, he took down his profile, just like he told me he would!!!

SO, HERE'S THE QUESTION - How to handle this "date" he has tonight. Show up and confront him? Let him think he got stood up? If I do that, do I confront him (which includes admitting I was the fake girl) or do I just let it go - is this his one last date? I've been guilty of that. I need a strategy. HELP!!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
In reply to: lobster_girl
Tue, 07-18-2006 - 4:57pm
Vetty interesting.
Pulling up a chair, bringing out the pop corn and propping my feet up for the responses to this one.
You obviously caught a rat and he reeks! He reeks!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-13-2006
In reply to: lobster_girl
Tue, 07-18-2006 - 5:14pm
Thanks. the problem is that this date is in a few hours and I need a plan ASAP!!
Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: lobster_girl
Tue, 07-18-2006 - 5:28pm

Here's essentially your problem.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
In reply to: lobster_girl
Tue, 07-18-2006 - 5:50pm

OH.MY.GOD

I say show up at the date, reveal that you are fake girl, that you caught his behind then promptly pour whatever drink that's on the table over his head.

Then let him know its over and make your dramatic exit.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-13-2006
In reply to: lobster_girl
Tue, 07-18-2006 - 5:57pm
I'm inclined to agree with you. I want him to have to face this head-on. Question: Do I tell him what "I'm" wearing and get there early to sit with my back to the entrance until he has to walk up to me, OR do I let him get there first and then corner him? This is a very important aspect of the plan!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
In reply to: lobster_girl
Tue, 07-18-2006 - 6:02pm

Yeah, tell him what your wearing, but let him get there first so you can corner him.

If you get there first, there is a slight chance he may figure out its you and either try one last minute lie to explain the coincidence of bumping into you or it'll give him a split second to bail and get out of there.

I've had to confront an ex with this same kind of cheating so I've been there. Me and the other girl both confronted him after setting him up and got him in a corner...in his own apartment! It was ugly but it had to be done.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-13-2006
In reply to: lobster_girl
Tue, 07-18-2006 - 6:42pm
Thank you! What should I say?
Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: lobster_girl
Tue, 07-18-2006 - 6:47pm
I saw your post on the Online Dating message board. Are you looking for more suggestions here?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
In reply to: lobster_girl
Tue, 07-18-2006 - 6:51pm

Just tell him that although he was expecting fake girl, it turned out to be yiu. Tell him off, where to go and how to get there.

Pour drink over head and storm out.

Let us know what happens!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-13-2006
In reply to: lobster_girl
Tue, 07-18-2006 - 6:56pm
I have a very limited amount of time to collect ideas so yes, I posted the same message on a couple of boards to get as many responses as possible.

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