How do you tell when a guy is flirting?

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
How do you tell when a guy is flirting?
32
Mon, 05-19-2003 - 6:00pm
This weekend, I was at a party and as I was leaving, I found myself in the kitchen with the host's brother. He started asking me questions like where I went to school, how I knew the host, what I taught, etc. My goal was to get out of there as quickly as possible b/c I was NOT interested (very feminine man), but then I thought- was he just being friendly? Or was he trying to show interest?

How do you tell the difference between a guy/gal who is flirting and one who is just being friendly?

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Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 05-19-2003 - 6:45pm
The one who is flirting asks you out!

Sheri

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Mon, 05-19-2003 - 7:53pm
So you don't think a guy will ever just flirt for flirting's sake? You're making it way too simple, Sheri!

I don't think that every guy who has flirted with me necessarily wants to ask me out, and I don't think that every guy who I've flirted with I've wanted to go out with. Sometimes, it's just all about attention.

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 05-19-2003 - 7:57pm
You're right; I was pretty much making a joke.

All kidding aside ;-), I always assume that someone is just being friendly unless he asks me out.

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Mon, 05-19-2003 - 9:17pm
That's what I don't like about this new format! I always forget to look at icons. I wasn't sure if you were serious or not!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-20-2003 - 10:04am
a guy asking you lots of questions is flirting?

ummm... methinks you need to lower the polarity on your guy-dar...

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Tue, 05-20-2003 - 10:47am
Methinks you need to read more carefully. He certainly wasn't flirting. I said "showing interest" when I referred to that situation b/c I knew he wasn't flirting.

THEN I asked a question, which was prompted by the situation (but not about it) b/c I knew I was probably reading too much into it and thought I'd take it to the next level to make it a little more interesting.

You still didn't answer the question.

Avatar for schnappsers
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-20-2003 - 12:38pm
I'm so glad you said that! I'm basically so oblivious to these things that that's the only clue I catch on to!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Tue, 05-20-2003 - 1:48pm
That reminds me... my friend R., who I saw more of at Christmas break than my own family, has said things that make me wonder if he's interested...

phrases like:

"We're the type of people who..."/"We'd be the couple who..."

He had commented on how he would like to lose weight, and I said, "I'll just have to chase you around the block a few times..." and his response was "What makes you think I would run away from you?" or something like that.

I could read a lot into it, but I am just taking it at face value for now.

We talk at least once a week, and he is keeping a countdown to when I'm going home for the summer...

Is that flirting or genuine interest?

summer 2010 sig by Tara

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-20-2003 - 2:08pm
okay, to me, showing interest IS flirting. so you can see how i misconstrued your Q?

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Tue, 05-20-2003 - 3:40pm
I don't think it's the same. Flirting to me is more of a physical type thing, whereas showing interest in me wouldn't be.

I'm still waiting for you to answer the darn question. You're really good at avoiding questions, you know that? ;-)

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