How long should you wait.....
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How long should you wait.....
| Thu, 02-23-2006 - 12:01pm |
to have sex?? Especially in these days, where one-night stands and fwb's are all around us, how long should you wait if you want to be in a more serious relationship???

I think that varies for every person. Wait as long as you need to so that you are comfortable and confident in your choice.
Trina
For me it seems like the longer my preceeding dry spell, the less time I wait.
I've determined that for me, waiting about 2 months is a good idea, in situations where I'm looking for a serious LTR. That's because I tend to get emotionally attached once I have sex with someone, and I suspend good judgment, so even if the guy turns out to be a jerk (or just not right for me), it's hard for me to end it. So by waiting, I reduce the chances that I will stay involved with someone who's not right for me.
A good example: I recently broke things off with someone because he was unreliable and flaky about contacting me (reliability and consistency are important to me). We'd been out on about 8-10 dates, but hadn't yet slept together and it was much easier to break things off because of that. If we had been sleeping together, I'm sure I would have rationalized and made excuses for his behavior.
Also, it's important to me that the relationship be exclusive before we sleep together, and even if someone *says* we're exclusive, if we've only gone out a few times, I have no idea of how honest he is. At least if we've been dating regularly for 2 months, I'll have a better idea of how consistent his words and actions are. That's not to say that someone can't fool you into thinking they are honest, but a lot of times, I have found out less than 2 months into it that they aren't, and I was very glad I hadn't slept with them!
Sheri
Edited 2/23/2006 6:38 pm ET by northwestwanderer