how soon is it proper to call after...
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how soon is it proper to call after...
| Mon, 09-26-2005 - 11:24pm |
...after sex with an Ex i am now "dating" (i think dating at this point)
hi, im new to the board with a question ... first a little background info: i was in a relationship with a guy for 1.5 years but we broke up 6 months ago and had no contact whatsoever until last month we started talking again a couple times a week, then we saw each other which i guess you could call two dates even though i had told him i didnt want it to seem too date like. things have been really cool and revived between us. i totally thought i was in it just for friendship but we went out sat night n it seemed like a date with the way we were clicking and flirting, then again got together sunday to spend the day together. well, we had sex sunday morning. we spent the whole day together after that which was really fun. he made me lunch and was so sweet all day. he treated me really well and we talked a little about how looking back on all of the ppl we have dated since, we each were most emotionally connected to each other. i dont think it was a get-back-together conversation exactly as it didnt feel that official. so now i am a little nervous about what just happened between us over the weekend. we basically spent the whole weekend together. we even talked on the phone when i got home from a concert i went with my other friends to last night.
well, i have not heard from him today. is this a really bad sign? i was hoping we were revivng the relationship. maybe i am jumping to conclusions too soon. should i just relax and give it another day before i think the sex was a stupid mistake? i wish i knew what he was thinking now...maybe he is just as confused as i am.
thanks for any advice!
dionne
hi, im new to the board with a question ... first a little background info: i was in a relationship with a guy for 1.5 years but we broke up 6 months ago and had no contact whatsoever until last month we started talking again a couple times a week, then we saw each other which i guess you could call two dates even though i had told him i didnt want it to seem too date like. things have been really cool and revived between us. i totally thought i was in it just for friendship but we went out sat night n it seemed like a date with the way we were clicking and flirting, then again got together sunday to spend the day together. well, we had sex sunday morning. we spent the whole day together after that which was really fun. he made me lunch and was so sweet all day. he treated me really well and we talked a little about how looking back on all of the ppl we have dated since, we each were most emotionally connected to each other. i dont think it was a get-back-together conversation exactly as it didnt feel that official. so now i am a little nervous about what just happened between us over the weekend. we basically spent the whole weekend together. we even talked on the phone when i got home from a concert i went with my other friends to last night.
well, i have not heard from him today. is this a really bad sign? i was hoping we were revivng the relationship. maybe i am jumping to conclusions too soon. should i just relax and give it another day before i think the sex was a stupid mistake? i wish i knew what he was thinking now...maybe he is just as confused as i am.
thanks for any advice!
dionne

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to my great surprise he called me around 6:30 this evening. i was in the middle of dinner with my friends so i just called him back now...he was so excited to tell me about the rialto center having upcoming symphony and he wanted to take me! i was so flattered, almost speechless. he was so kind on the phone. (the new version of him is so much better than the old him. i really do have this faith that he has changed) so, we're going sunday to a symphony!! how exciting!
oh, and he also wants to take me to this conference oct 22nd! that's kinda far off huh.
i actually feel really grateful that he and i are coming together in a new way. the breakup was really awful as neither of us were managing stress well at the time and we felt we needed to break from each other to get our lives in order and find ourselves. we'll see what happens...i guess i'm allowed to enjoy it if it is going well.
jules, im just curious are you still friends with that guy? did he keep trying to get you back?
you're right i shouldnt play two sides of the coin. i will have to be honest with him when i see him on sunday. yes, he did call this evening and he was so excited to invite me to a show this sunday.
i'm just nervous b/c i dont want to lose him twice and i am mainly talking about friendship not even getting back together when i refer to losing him twice. i dont want to do something stupid like have sex and freak up the situation. neither of us need discomfort.
Well,
There are actually two men that I have dated and then had that kind of experience with. One I was completely in love with and he broke my heart pretty badly. He is known as the B*st*rd amongst my friends and I - not because he is a bad guy - but because he hurt me so severely. We tried to be friends and I finally ended it because it was killing me. The other man and I broke up last June, so well over a year ago. He has become one of the best friends that I have. I was feeling really lonely recently and spent hours crying and he listened and gave advice and told me how amazing I am and assured me that I will meet someone. We have never gotten back together - we love one another but are not in love. And there is still the occasionaly hook up which is fine because there were never those "in love" feelings but we are close and so there is an element of emotional intimacy in addition to the sex. Much better than one night stand sex.
Jules
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