I am a week man

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2007
I am a week man
11
Sat, 10-20-2007 - 8:31pm

I just deleted this. I think that proves the point. I am a week man.I miss someone I truly loved.

We in America do not have government by the majority. We have government by the majority who participate.

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Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Sat, 10-20-2007 - 9:39pm

We all have our moments of weakness.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2007
Sun, 10-21-2007 - 10:06am

I was sitting around looking through a bunch of pictures, never a bright idea if you want to stay in a good mood. To many good memories, that is a sad thing. It is always easier when the memories are not so happy. It is also very sad that almost a year later I have not let it go. I truly look at that as a weakness at this point. Pathetic is more like it. LoL


Oh well . . . so much for being perfect I suppose. ((-:


We in America do not have government by the majority. We have government by the majority who participate.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2007
Sun, 10-21-2007 - 11:11am

That is not a sign of weakness.

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Sun, 10-21-2007 - 12:31pm

I agree.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2007
Sun, 10-21-2007 - 1:03pm

I kind of see it as a practical matter. This is a case where there is no going back, so just letting go of it is the only thing that can be done. I am usually quite good at possessing information that way and then actually doing it. I am not sure as to why in this case with this girl it has been and continues to be difficult. I still miss her every day. In the end, the simple fact is I need to stop thinking about her, and so far the first day has not past without doing so. Last night I sat looking at all these pictures like an idiot and that certainly was not what I would have advised any of my friends to have done. ((-:


Truthfully it was silly, stupid and foolish. I allowed myself to start it and then allowed it to kind of ruin my night, and that by any definition is self pity. I cant go back, so it is in fact week and self indulgent to wallow in it every single time.

We in America do not have government by the majority. We have government by the majority who participate.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2004
Sun, 10-21-2007 - 1:53pm

I had to respond. I've been going through the same thing recently. I moved back to the city I was with my ex in (for school) and it has been bringing up a lot of stuff I had thought was dealt with. Though my main concern is running into him (I'm terrified of that!) I was doing SO well when I had moved away and was completely removed from things that would remind me of him. But I didnt have much of a choice in schools since this is the only one offering the program that I've always wanted to be in.

I've found that once you start doing things like looking at old pictures or mementos it is all too easy to go in a downward spiral. I have found that having a good day really helps lift you out of the "weakness". I've been keeping up with my hobbies, spending time with friends, and motivating myself to be active and involved with school. It does help, but its not going to make it go away. And dont feel bad about it being one year since you broke up. For me its been almost 2.5 years, and I'm still having issues! LOL I certainly wish I had the answer to making it easy to get over a relationship, and not caring anymore.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Sun, 10-21-2007 - 2:40pm

With the ending of any relationship, grief is normal and needs to be processed.


Carrie

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-26-2007
Sun, 10-21-2007 - 4:50pm

I just bought a wall plaque for my home that says:


What we have once enjoyed
we can never lose...
All that we love deeply
becomes a part of us.

-Helen Keller


My other bit of encouragement is a song:


"Starts With Goodbye" by Carrie Underwood

I was sitting on my doorstep,
I hung up the phone and it fell out of my hand,
But I knew I had to do it,
And he wouldn't understand,
So hard to see myself without him,
I felt a piece of my heart break,
But when you're standing at a crossroad,
There's a choice you gotta make.


I guess it's gonna have to hurt,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
I guess it's gonna break me down,
Like falling when you try to fly,
It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye.

I know there's a blue horizon,
Somewhere up ahead, just waiting for me,
Getting there means leaving things behind,
Sometimes life's so bitter sweet.


I guess it's gonna have to hurt,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
I guess it's gonna break me down,
Like falling when you try to fly,
It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye.

Time, time heals,
The wounds that you feel,
Somehow, right now.


I guess it's gonna have to hurt,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
I guess it's gonna break me down,
Like falling when you try to fly,
It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
Starts with goodbye,
The only way you try to find,
Moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye,
Na na na na na na na.


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
Mon, 10-22-2007 - 9:30am
You are definitely not a weak man. You are a feeling, loving, emotion-filled man, a human and that is totally natural and normal. Don't beat yourself up. I think we've all been there. Myself, not very long ago. It just shows you have a good heart to continue to care for another like that. An admirable quality in my book.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2003
Thu, 11-08-2007 - 12:47am

More than yourself?

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