I Can't Believe that I'm Asking This

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
I Can't Believe that I'm Asking This
8
Thu, 05-18-2006 - 8:23pm
What do I do to show a girl that I like her? For someone who does not know how to show it, this is a real question....
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
Thu, 05-18-2006 - 9:13pm
I need more info. How do you know this girl? Where do you see her?
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 05-18-2006 - 10:28pm

Is this a trick question? You ask her out, you plan a nice date, you take her out, then at the end of that date, you ask her out again, you plan another nice date, and you take her out again, etc, etc. You ask her questions, you show interest in her life, you treat her well and behave like a gentleman. It's not rocket science.

What am I missing here?

Sheri

Avatar for bluebird1234
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2003
Thu, 05-18-2006 - 10:44pm

If you're in a social setting, you start a conversation with her and ask questions about herself. If she's interested she'll probably want to keep the conversation going. If you're at work, you still try to start a converstion, but maybe just small talk to start, see what happens. Develop a friendship.

Basically, showing a woman attention and being interested in her and what she has to say, will let her know that you are interested in her. Maybe ask her out for lunch or coffee, something light, if you're somewhat shy to start with or want to gauge her interest.

That's about it for starters . . . .

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-19-2003
Fri, 05-19-2006 - 12:43am

I agree wholeheartedly and I agree with Sheri too.
With a little reminder that if you come on too strong and start professing eternal love too early we assume you are just another needy weirdo and dump you.
Keep it casual and light and let us get to know you and please don't feign an interest in something that you hate..EG: Bingo,opera, sewing, womens ice skating..you get the idea. If we find out you actually hate these things later, we feel tricked and lied to and that can be hazardous to the relationship.
This does not pertain to romantic comedies, we understand that you endure them for us and we appreciate that :)

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Fri, 05-19-2006 - 7:54am

I have to add one more thing.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 05-19-2006 - 2:50pm
So, I guess, what is considered creepy? For example, yesterday on the street, I saw someone interesting. Afterward, while replaying the incident in my head, I thought maybe I can say pleasantly, "Hi, I just want to come over to tell you that yo are beautiful!" After she smiles and says thanks, I go like, "My name is .... Can I have your number?" I know that in complimenting her like that, I may scare her off. However, I cannot think of anything else. She is a complete stranger, so I either do something or never see her again. Would that be considered creepy?
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 05-19-2006 - 4:35pm

Yeah...I would not react well to a stranger just coming up to me on the street, in a situation where we couldn't have conversation. And I would REALLY be turned off if he commented on my appearance...that's totally cheesy to me. But some women would like it, so you'd be taking a chance that she was one of those women ;-).

You need to find common ground if you're going to approach someone out of the blue, IMO. That's why it's good to meet people at activities, so you at least have that to talk about.

Besides, your original post was about *liking* someone. You can't "like" someone you've never even talked to!!!

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 05-19-2006 - 7:48pm

Yes, I know that I should try to start a conversation and find some common point, but like in the situation I just described, when we were walking past each other, starting a conversation seems more awkward. I might as well get to the point and ask for her number.... The best example I can think of was when a woman told me at an intersection, "These drivers are so rude. They don't let the pedestrians cross first."

My purpose, I guess, is to be comfortable in validating my feelings and expressing the fact that I like somebody. I understand the risk, and who knows? Maybe after a few practices I will become more creative....