I Hate Sex, I Love Power

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-29-2004
I Hate Sex, I Love Power
20
Thu, 07-28-2005 - 4:17pm

What an inspiration. This is a new book by Andace Rose. It truly helped me cope with my current situation. I suggest everyone check it out, she is a truly talented writer. Let me know if you've heard about it yet?
-icgreen2

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2004
Sat, 07-30-2005 - 3:35am
I can't say I've read it. I've seen it on the book shelves though. With me I go back and forth between the power and the sex. I like using sex as a weapon but at the same time I also like sex. It's almost like I'm caught punishing myself when I use sex as a prize and the guy I'm with doesn't deserve the prize....
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-29-2004
Mon, 08-01-2005 - 12:19pm
You're so right. We as women can't help but to use sex as a weapon because the world makes us think that is our only power. The way I interpret Andace Rose's, I Hate Sex, I Love Power is to use the power in my mind to realize how sex has jaded me. I love sex to but I have started to realize that I have so much more to offer someone and unlike sex, I am the prize.
-icgreen2
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-25-2005
Mon, 08-01-2005 - 4:26pm
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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Mon, 08-01-2005 - 4:32pm
I would have to disagree that the world makes us feel like sex is our only source of power. You may feel that way, but I sure don't. In fact, I would almost go so far as to say that the opposite is true. I feel that my real strength lies in the fact that I am an intelligent, strong, and very successful woman. The men in my life have always found these qualities to be a very large part of what makes me attractive to them. I enjoy my sexuality and femininity, but I would definitely not say that I feel like it is my most important source of power, much less my only one.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-29-2004
Tue, 08-02-2005 - 10:51am
You took what i wrote incorrectly, I was simply stating that this world tries to make us think that sex is all that we have to offer. I certaintly do not believe that. I am a strong and intelligent woman who embraces the gifts that God has given me. And upon reading " I Hate Sex, I Love Power" my thoughts and feeling were justified. I think women of all ages have lost the true meaning of what it is to be a woman and that has absolutely nothing to do with sex.
-icgreen2
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Tue, 08-02-2005 - 11:04am

I don't think that I misunderstood you at all.

I completely disagree with this statement: I was simply stating that this world tries to make us think that sex is all that we have to offer.

How does the world try to make us think that? I don't see it at all. I think that it may be your perception of the situation because I don't see the world trying to do this.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-03-2005
Tue, 08-02-2005 - 12:28pm

I agree with you IC - Jules is trying to fight it but she knows it's true... she just doesn't want to admit it or believe it - none of us do - so we all do what we can to fight that truth - she's just doing what she knows to do to fight it!

I have to admit I use sex as power but I also like sex so I tend to give up my power too easily to some! Damgamit! :p

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Tue, 08-02-2005 - 12:34pm

I would be careful to not make assumptions about what other people know or don't know. I am not a deluded person. I have a pretty good sense of self. Just because I don't feel victimized by culture like the two of you do does not mean that I am trying to "fight' anything.

It must be nice to be so omniscient.

Avatar for cfk_3
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-1999
Tue, 08-02-2005 - 1:27pm

icqreen, feelingratherlost and, auntjules,

I would be interested, if you all have the time of course, in knowing what influenced each of your views on this topic. What experiences or public figures (whether that be politicians, entertainers, business women, religious leaders, etc.) helped mold your outlooks regarding women and their roles in society?

Thanks in advance!




Edited 8/2/2005 1:29 pm ET ET by bbw_26
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-12-2005
Tue, 08-02-2005 - 2:27pm
Just out of curiousity, how does sex give you power? I can understand if you are a supermodel and have been able to make money off of your looks. But for the everyday woman, using sex as power will probably just lead to men losing interest in you. Not because men are only interested in women for sex, but rather because women who use sex as power come off as too inhibited. Men want women who are comfortable with themselves and don't have agendas. Using sex as a weapon is having an agenda. It's playing games in order to frustrate another person. This may result in you feeling a sense of power, but it will also leave you very alone...

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