I messed up - how do I fix it?
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| Mon, 04-09-2007 - 12:11pm |
I went out Fri night with some friends and met a guy that I know through work, but we've only cooresponded through email and phone. I met him face to face finally and he and I flirted for much of the night. I really like him - he's not like the goober I'm currently dating. This would be a guy who's in it for the long haul. I know he liked me because at one point we were leaning close to talk (the music was loud) and he kissed my cheek. I backed away because it surprised me.
Ok, so then it got bad. We went to the patio and some friends of his happened to be there. So he introduced me to everyone, and in particular to this really really hot guy. Well, me and Mr. Hottie ended up making out for the rest of the night.
I don't expect to see the hottie again and I was really drunk, and I think I messed up with the nice guy. Hottie even said a few times that he feels bad for taking me away from his friend because he knew the friend was into me.
So how do I fix this? Should I apologize? Leave it alone? I sent him a work email this morning, but I didn't mention Fri night. Should I said another and...I dunno...apologize? Maybe I shouldn't mention the hottie. I did spill my drink on the nice guy on two separate occasions, so maybe I could apologize for that as a way to start off? What do you guys think?

Hi
Ok first off, let's deal with the "goober" you are dating before tackling this new nice guy. If you are not into him break it off. It isn't fair to string him along until someone better comes along.
Secondly if this guy at work is such a nice guy apologize for spilling your drink and for your behavior. Then leave it alone. If he is still interested at that point he will let you know.
Honestly though, if a guy did that to you would you ever be able to trust him? Every time he went out drinking you would wonder. If this guy does give you a second chance you may want to take a cebatical from alcohol for a while.
Sincerely,
Caterina
Eek - your are right. Oh, and about the goober - he has made it clear that we are not exclusive, but he's sending serious mixed signals, which is what makes him a goober. He's also dating other people, so it's not like I cheated on him.
And you are absolutely right about the trust thing. I didn't think of it from that point of view. He would always wonder about me, especially since I did that on the first night we met and he doesn't really know anything about me.
I did email him an apology and we bantered back and forth for a bit, with some inside jokes between us from the other night. We didn't mention the other guy, but I definitely got the feel that although he accepted my apology, this won't go any further.
Darnit. I complain because all I seem to attract are guys who want casual affairs or booty calls, then I finally meet a decent, NORMAL guy and I go and screw it up. Yeah, I'm definitely staying away from alcohol for a very long while :P