I think I"ve temporarily given up looking for a guy

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
I think I"ve temporarily given up looking for a guy
46
Tue, 03-27-2012 - 9:02pm

I'm more or less done w/ OLD--my match subscription ran out and I didn't renew and I haven't even been tempted to look--every time they send me one of those emails w/ potential matched, it's always guys who have been on forever and I probably already tried emailing them anyway.

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Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006

On the surface it seems like common sense, doesn't it?

But take for instance parents who expect and pressure their child to become a doctor, even though the child doesn't really want to. The child feels obligated to go to medical school even though what he really wants to do is be a writer. He may have a hard time not only bucking his parents but in really convincing himself that what he wants is to write.

Or even if one's parents aren't pressuring you, a woman might feel like being a dancer isn't "important" enough, or that it's "impractical."

I also have a friend who has always had a hard time identifying what she really wanted to do for a career, and has spent her life underemployed and going from one unsatisfactory job to another.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008

oh; I get that Florida but I was thinking that sometimes we might miss out on opportunities if we just do what we like.

Lets say I hated something with a passion but I know that available men go. Lets take golf.. I dont like golf that much but I have taken lessons for fun and I can actually hit the ball at the driving range. Its not something I would do alot but its where men go? so I would go just to see if there were any available men there for me.. I think we might be talking apples and oranges. right??

I think in order to find what

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2008

Well, with all of that effort, I hope you do find someone soon.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008

ha ha..

well I

Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006

I couldn't agree more. Been there done that. But here's the question: why not just go do things you really like? Wouldn't you* be even MORE likely to meet a like-minded man there? I'm all for thinking outside the box and trying new things: that's not what I'm talking about. But when your life becomes this long, dreary, dogged pursuit of men it's depressing.

I've said it before: let him find me for a change.

*"you" in this case is the universal "you", not Gleannfia

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008

you know I have this guy I know from HS and he says to me.. Just wait and a man will appear. Well? Its been awhile and no man.

So same old I wish a man would come and find me but I am not sure it happens like that and I wish it were that easy.

Oh; the HS guy is married and he believes in destiny and fate. Meanwhile he must have single friends and I have asked him about them but he ignores me..

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