If you have alot of time, read my latest

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2007
If you have alot of time, read my latest
7
Thu, 11-01-2007 - 1:31pm

Well, hey again everyone, every time I come here, I am here with something more messed up... Anyway, here is the latest issue in my life, its a long one.

Also, incase anyone does not know me, I'm a 22 male who pretty much over analyzes everything

Alright, so V is the girl I’m currently sleeping with who I don’t want to date. Well, when things began she had a boyfriend, well they broke up 2 weeks ago, and since then she’s been trying really hard to hang out all the time, and I’ve been trying to back away from the situation, but to no avail.

Anyway she had a Halloween party on sat, and my friend C (who is also Vs roommate) Just started dating her childhood best friend named K. Anyway, so K has been around pretty much for the entire me and V saga and actually lived at their apartment for a few weeks after he broke up with his recent gf (he broke up with her for C)
OK anyway, so he brought his little sister (S) to the party (not creepy, she’s 22) and we really hit it off. Ended up spending the entire night hanging out with her, and just flirting
So S and K ended up sleeping over Vs, and they hung out all day sunday. I spent the whole day trying to hang out with S, and V spent the whole day trying to get me to nap with her :-/

Anyway, so S (along with her brother, they have an apt together) lives around Salem, MA. A few of my friends where going up there and asked if I wanted to go.
So I went for it and left S a facebook message

What I wrote

ME - 6:07pm October 31st
Hey, nice meeting you over the weekend and such. Anyway, I'm heading up to Salem in an hour with some friends (I know, bad idea, but it wasn't my choice). I'm pretty sure you and K live around there somewhere... So if you'll be around the area give me a call, maybe we can meet up.

***-***-****

Her - 6:37pm October 31st
damnit i think i xed out ok what i said is that we will be there and ill call u

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Well, she didn’t call . Also I’m pretty sure she talked to her brother about it, because Vs acting a bit standoffish with me, and she mentioned talking to K (and that he did go last night). I don’t know why she didn’t call though,

I wrote back to her last night when I got in

ME -
Today at 12:05am
pssshh, Liar!

lol, first time to Salem for Halloween, and its was alright, but we couldn't get into any bars down there :-/. Hope you had better luck then us

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

But yeah, so, long story short. I think Vs, roommates boyfriends sister is awesome, and I want to get to know her.

I’m hoping to get some sort of message on facebook today, do you think she talked to her brother and decided against calling because of him?

Any advice at all would be great

And yes, I suck I know

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-08-2006
Thu, 11-01-2007 - 1:51pm

The only advice I have is end things with V before you run off pursuing someone else. It's not fair to her for you keep her hanging on thinking the two of you have something that you don't. Even if you have an established FWB relationship her behavior suggests she wants more and since you know that you don't want more you should end it. Besides the other girl will probably find you much more attractive if you are single.

good luck,

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Thu, 11-01-2007 - 1:58pm
Ditto to what yogagirl said. End one thing before you start another. If you don't want to date V, tell her sooner than later. It sounds like she's getting attached.

Oh, and a casual sexual relationship is fine--BUT both parties should know that that's what it is. It sounds like V thinks there's more to it, and that's really not fair.

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2006
Thu, 11-01-2007 - 2:06pm

Ok, first of all, no offense, but all of those letter names were confusing and a little amusing.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2007
Thu, 11-01-2007 - 7:08pm

so its been about a day, and if she doesnt respond I guess I'll just be forced to let the situation go. I'm just pretty upset about it, because I havent met a girl who's really sparked my interest like this for at least 6 months, and meeting new people doesnt happen as often as it should :-/.

I'm sure I'll see her around though. I'll let you guys know if she says anything, or if anything gets leaked to me. (I'm going over Vs tonight, and her roommate would most likely ask me about it if she knew)

Also, about this whole V situation... I have been overly upfront with V about my feelings about not being in a relationship with her an such, but everyone is right, I should really just get out of that situation. :-/

Anyway, thanks for the help/ just listening to my ramblings, it really helps to have an outlet like this sometimes.




Edited 11/1/2007 7:14 pm ET by kerplunk237
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2007
Fri, 11-02-2007 - 9:22am

Grrr...

So yeah, no response still. The only thing that bothers me from the whole thing is the fact that she responded back saying she would call. For some reason she changed her mind to the point where she didn't call, and isn't even responding... I was over Vs last night hanging out with her and her roommate. Her boyfriend called (S's Brother) and seemed somewhat pissed when my name was mentioned... or at least that's what I got from Cs face.

IDK, do you think I should dig a little, maybe talk to C to see if anything's up (although she's known to have a big mouth) or do I just try to forget about the whole thing?

I don't know what it is about this girl... but I just really want to see if there's something there.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2005
Fri, 11-02-2007 - 3:25pm

I think it's nice that your interest has really been sparked by this girl (S, is it?), but i think you should think it out for a little further into the future.


first, how awkward would it be if S *did* start calling you and you started seeing each other, and you still had this messy fwb-type thing with V? that would be difficult for everyone.


i would say that if you want the chance of a nice, comfortable thing with S, you should first think of V. go to her in the most respectful way and tell her that you

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2007
Sun, 11-04-2007 - 10:22pm

So.. a lot happened this weekend.

On friday I broke things off with "V" properly, well... In a drunken mess, but still did it, there was a bit of crying, but all in all it went well. I slept there though do to being a bit to drunk to head home, and things were great the next morning, we went out for lunch, and just had a long conversation about everything. Even about "S" because V pretty much knew what was up.

The story with S doesnt quite add up though, what go back to me is that I was too "nerdy" for her... Which is odd? But I dont buy that, because of how things were on sat and sunday... But thats something to deal with on a different day I guess.

But the V situation is all under control, and it really seems like it'll be an easy transition back to just friends...