Internet Dating

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2005
Internet Dating
45
Mon, 09-26-2005 - 9:51am
I (finally) decided to make a serious attempt at Internet dating. I've sent my first message already! Women, what would compel you to reply to a message that a man has sent you? Would he need to be excessively handsome and unbelievably charming? If so, I have a fair chance at achieving success!
Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: hal_9000
Tue, 09-27-2005 - 10:42pm

I don't respond to men with unsearchable profiles.

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: hal_9000
Tue, 09-27-2005 - 10:48pm

I think the explanation for that is simply that we can tell right off if we're going to be attracted to someone and their mannerisms, etc. when we meet in real life.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2005
In reply to: hal_9000
Wed, 09-28-2005 - 2:45am

Matt,

I have never met and dated a woman directly via a Dating Agency but I have met a few women via the Internet. I am a still good friend with one who I met years ago. I am a person who likes to keep all options open and there is no disadvantage to Online Dating. It's an 'AND' not an 'OR' function - I say "Hello" to real women in the real world AND in the virtual world.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2005
In reply to: hal_9000
Wed, 09-28-2005 - 3:02am

Sheri,

I didn't even consider the possibility that the women I have contacted may only be free members. I didn't include my e-mail address in any of the messages I have sent. I have read posts from women using Online Dating and most don't take ‘FREE’ members seriously and neither will I. I won’t include my e-mail address in messages because if I am not worth a subscription they are not worth my time.

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: hal_9000
Wed, 09-28-2005 - 7:44am

Hal, if these women are like me, they might find it a waste of money to pay just to reply to ONE person.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2005
In reply to: hal_9000
Wed, 09-28-2005 - 9:10am
I have always been sceptical, even critical of Internet Dating and now I am adding disillusioned to my list. I subscribed because I am taking it seriously and I can’t imagine why anyone who proclaims to take it seriously wouldn’t subscribe. The major downfall with Internet Dating web sites is that they allow people to join for free and send messages, even if they are only icebreakers. People then find ways to circumvent paying. It’s no wonder I hear disaster stories from people who have tried Internet Dating-- You get what you pay for. As someone much smarter than me once said “The bitterness of poor quality remains long after the sweetness of price is forgotten”. I am not going to bother with any free members and have even written that on my profile.
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: hal_9000
Wed, 09-28-2005 - 9:35am

Well, speaking only for myself...I'm very serious about meeting someone, but I'm not a subscriber to any services at this moment. I hate paying for more than a month at a time (I'm eternally optimistic that THIS month will be the month I meet "him", LOL) so I will pay for a month, contact a bunch of people, then not pay for a few months, then join again once I have at least 3 or 4 men who've written to me who I'm interested in.

And even if someone is a paying member, a negative comment like that in your profile could turn them off. I would take it out, or at least make sure that it is worded positively.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
In reply to: hal_9000
Wed, 09-28-2005 - 9:51am
I'm with Sheri on that.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2005
In reply to: hal_9000
Wed, 09-28-2005 - 10:03am

>And even if someone is a paying member, a negative
>comment like that in your profile could turn them off.
>I would take it out, or at least make sure
>that it is worded positively.

That is a good point. I think I did word it positively and added it at the bottom of the about me section. I got my first reply ½ an hour ago.

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: hal_9000
Wed, 09-28-2005 - 3:27pm

One more note about winks/icebreakers. I know a lot of women use them to gauge interest...if we get enough responses then we subscribe and send emails to the men who did respond. So don't automatically dismiss the winks you get...if you're interested, wink or email back...you never know!

Sheri