Is it a Men's Market?
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| Mon, 07-09-2007 - 9:20am |
So this has been a running discussion among my friends for a few weeks and I want to know what you all think about your areas.
I've come to the conclusion that at least where I live (MD/DC area) the dating scene is a men's market as they have a "multitude" of options, as many men have told me as far as finding attractive, intelligent, dateable women. Whereas we women are left basically trying to grab whatever is left as there are very few attractive, intelligent, dateable men. In fact, me and my friends have come to the conclusion that we must live in an overwhelmingly unattractive city as we can't seem to find men here that are reasonably attractive. The problem is my city (Baltimore) is high in "ghetto mentality" and most men here like to sport the ghetto, hip hop, thug look which does nothing but detract the professional career-oriented women such as myself and my friends. While there are TONS of beautiful women everywhere, basically chasing down the good ones, who are left with so many options, they needn't choose so they juggle all that they can commitment-free.
So what do you think? Is it a "men's market" where you area? How often you do see attractive men out and about? How often do you see attractive women out and about?
Any other thoughts?

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I don't know how old you are, but I can say, at almost 53, attractive available men are like hen's teeth around here. I've also noticed the phenomenon of men who aren't even divorced yet hooking up right away. Not so for divorcing women.
And on top of that, there's a real "Bubba" thing going on here. Don't get me wrong, we've got cultured, educated people here as well, but they are out numbered. People have told me I should move to a more cultured area, but I think it's just hard everywhere, especially at my age.
I will add that I think men have the additional advantage of being the ones who can do the asking. I know, I know, it's the 21st century, women can do the asking, but I still say men aren't really comfortable with that. They claim they like it, and I know they are flattered, but I still say they want to do the asking.
Dang and to think I left my home state, Jersey, to be in the beautiful Northwest! Of course what I love about the people here is that they are not so much in-your-face as the tough Jersey gurls :-P.
Mark who is still looking for a mate after 7 years...
Ha ha on the "Bubba" comment. I'm 29 by the way. I think I also need to move to a more cultured area.
"I will add that I think men have the additional advantage of being the ones who can do the asking. I know, I know, it's the 21st century, women can do the asking, but I still say men aren't really comfortable with that. They claim they like it, and I know they are flattered, but I still say they want to do the asking."
I have to say I have noticed that whenever I approach a guy and pursue him I never get anywhere. I have asked a guy for his number, and either tried to engage him in a conversation ot asked him out and I NEVER get to a 2nd date. I've done this a few times and each time, the guy was clearly not interested. So I now believe if a guy is interested, he will ask. If he's not asking, he aint interested.
My 50 yr old friend observes the same thing Sheri, i.e. women are more interesting than men. They have more activities, interests, intellectually deeper/broader than the men she has experienced.
Mark
Wow, a man that actually agrees! Seriously!
Well I'm not going to say I find women more interesting but more overall appealing meaning that have it all "going on" PLUS the ability to love be supportive and be your best friend.
But while I do meet many interesting guy, many seem hesitant to get emotionally involved and don't really want to fall in love. They fight it like the Bejing flu. I've dated several guys where it seemed everything was fine, until they realized I really liked them, they couldn't have lept out the window fast enough. Cause emotions equal responsibility and responsibility is like ewww. Cooties!!
I'm being silly of course.
Edited 7/10/2007 9:26 am ET by elwood1960
Well, clearly there are always exceptions and you must be one of them. How about your friends? Are they all taken at this time or are they looking and sharing your same sentiments.
I mean, I'm not going to say there aren't any guys who are seeking love, it just seems like that are a vast minority. Definitly in my age range where running around with "the boys" is still far more important.
Edited 7/10/2007 9:26 am ET by elwood1960
Well I think both men and women has their own seperate issues in dating: men have to ask and pursue, women have to put up with men. *hee hee*
But quite honestly I think the asking for dates is the easy part. Actually engaging a person to the point where they can allow their guard down and allow themselves to really like or love you is the hardest part. And I think more women are open to that than men.
I just really feel like while more women crave a man's love, few men are really open to a woman's love. Too many would rather run from it for whatever personal reasons.
I think what she means is that if we do all the things women do to get your attention- look nice, flirt, smile, touch, etc. and we STILL have to do the asking, it's pretty clear that the guy isn't interested.
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