"Life in the fastlane"

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2006
"Life in the fastlane"
52
Mon, 03-19-2007 - 11:50am

First off, I know the title of this thread is strange, but it's the best way I can sum up what I'm getting at.

Anyway, it's always seemed to me that women, especially younger ones (late teens/early twenties) are attracted to guys who lead fast-paced, exciting lifestyles. It's a lifestyle I'd like to lead. The problem is, I only have the foggiest idea of what that lifestyle looks like and I have no idea how to achieve it. I'm usually busy (my days are packed with either work or school) but whenever I have free time, I am more than willing to sacrifice a few days/nights of my work and school schedule.

So I guess what I'm trying to ask is, how can I develop my own "life in the fastlane"? Not only that, but how do I let other people who normally wouldn't know me know that I lead such a lifestyle so as to draw them to me?

Try to remember back when you were all 18 to 21 year old girls again. If you heard about how some guy spent his weekend, what would make you say, "wow, he sounds really cool. I want to hang out with that guy"?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2005
Mon, 03-19-2007 - 2:26pm

Or dance lessons.

A man who can dance will never lack for dates.

Plus, what a great place to meet women!


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-27-2004
Mon, 03-19-2007 - 2:49pm
I think you are constantly trying to mold and shape yourself into someone that you think women would like. How about just trying to be yourself and not worrying about how others see you. If you want to do something adventurous and fun do it for you and not to impress women. I never would have gone for the "bad boys" when I was younger like I did if I knew where it would put me. I think the guys who are ambitious at a young age are the sexy ones. The party types completely turn me off. If you are just yourself and are comfortable with that you will exude a natural confidence that will draw women to you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2005
Mon, 03-19-2007 - 3:07pm
Do you ever watch "The Knights of Prosperity" In this one episode they remake one of the kids who is in college and wears sweaters and really nice clothes and is like in the Young Republicans of America or something, and they make him over and slick his hair and put a leather jacket on him and the woman says "He looks like Bowser from Sha-Na-Na" It made me burst into hysterics A) because I used to watch Sha-Na-Na and B) because he totally did look like him. But this is what I'm imagining as you are giving advice how to be a BAMF.

Smile,

Deirdre

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Mon, 03-19-2007 - 3:47pm

LOL

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-1999
Mon, 03-19-2007 - 11:27pm
When I was 18 to 21? Honestly? It would depend on what his friends were like, the music they listened to, the cars they drove, how popular they were around town, how much fun they were ie what clubs they frequented, how much they partied. I was a stupid, stupid kid when it came to men. Maybe the girls in your area are a little brighter.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2006
Tue, 03-20-2007 - 2:29pm

>>>Then by all means, try to find some new and different activities, but don't focus on trying to look like a badass, because, no offense, you'll just look ridiculous. My brother just bought a motorcycle this year, and he and all his friends laugh at people who are purposely trying to be "bad" and "live in the fast lane." They call them "posers."<<<

I personally hate it when people do this. Who's to decide who's being genuine and authentic and who's just pretending? What's the difference between a guy who leads that lifestyle naturally and a guy who leads it intentionally? It just seems really unfair and unreasonable to me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2006
Tue, 03-20-2007 - 2:35pm

>>>Or dance lessons.

A man who can dance will never lack for dates.

Plus, what a great place to meet women!<<<

That is a myth. Dance classes are NOT good places to meet women. I tried going to a campus dance class and a private one, and both were filled with tons of guys who thought they'd be able to meet tons of women there, but as a result, there were more men than women. And a good proportion of the girls there weren't even that attractive. I gave up after I went to 4 classes and couldn't get a dance partner either time.

Besides, the girls I want to meet are the kinds who like to go crazy at clubs and raves with techno and trance music. I've yet to hear of a dance course that teaches that kind of dancing. I don't think a lot of young women are interested in learning tango or salsa.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2006
Tue, 03-20-2007 - 2:42pm

>>>I think you are constantly trying to mold and shape yourself into someone that you think women would like. How about just trying to be yourself and not worrying about how others see you.<<<

Because I HAVE been being myself for 20+ years and it hasn't gotten me anywhere. And I don't see how it's possible to NOT care how other people see you. If you don't care what other people think about you, then why bother having a shower, brushing your teeth or wearing clean clothes? Why bother not blurting out insults at people who you think look funny or foolish? I just never understood that whole "not caring what other people think" mindset.

>>>I never would have gone for the "bad boys" when I was younger like I did if I knew where it would put me.<<<

But you DID good for "bad boys" when you were younger. That's what I want. I want girls to go for me. I honestly do not care AT ALL if they regret it further down the road 10 or 15 years for now. Why should I care if they regret it? Why should I let just the possibility that a girl MIGHT regret hooking up with me far off into the future keep me from enjoying life NOW?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2006
Tue, 03-20-2007 - 2:47pm

>>>LOL No, I never saw that, nor did I ever see Sha Na Na (I only know of Bowser from Sha Na Na because of Adam Sandler's Chanukah Song).

Anyway...other movies anyone who wants to become a BAMF (LOL at that, btw - at first I didn't know what that meant but once I did it made me giggle) must see:

Dazed and Confused

Fast Times At Ridgemont High

The Breakfast Club<<<

I hated The Breakfast Club. It's supposed to be a "feel good" movie with a happy ending, but I felt pretty bad and disheartened afterwards.

Why is it that the Jock who beat up and humiliated some poor kid got the girl, the Punk who smoked pot and drank got the girl (AFTER HE STRAIGHT UP TOLD HER HE HAD TONS OF OTHER GIRLFRIENDS) but the Nerd who didn't hurt anyone left alone?

>>>And there's always the Fonz from Happy Days. LOL <<<

Wouldn't that be the ultimate in being a poser?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2006
Tue, 03-20-2007 - 2:51pm

>>>When I was 18 to 21? Honestly? It would depend on what his friends were like, the music they listened to, the cars they drove, how popular they were around town, how much fun they were ie what clubs they frequented, how much they partied. I was a stupid, stupid kid when it came to men. Maybe the girls in your area are a little brighter.<<<

Not really. Girls, especially the more attractive ones, still go for those kind of guys. It seems really unfair though because I and most other guys don't care what your friends are like, the music you listen to, the car you drive, how popular you are and so forth, so I don't understand why it should matter to young girls. Still though, like I said, I'm willing to do anything, so how do I break into that popular circle?