"Life in the fastlane"

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2006
"Life in the fastlane"
52
Mon, 03-19-2007 - 11:50am

First off, I know the title of this thread is strange, but it's the best way I can sum up what I'm getting at.

Anyway, it's always seemed to me that women, especially younger ones (late teens/early twenties) are attracted to guys who lead fast-paced, exciting lifestyles. It's a lifestyle I'd like to lead. The problem is, I only have the foggiest idea of what that lifestyle looks like and I have no idea how to achieve it. I'm usually busy (my days are packed with either work or school) but whenever I have free time, I am more than willing to sacrifice a few days/nights of my work and school schedule.

So I guess what I'm trying to ask is, how can I develop my own "life in the fastlane"? Not only that, but how do I let other people who normally wouldn't know me know that I lead such a lifestyle so as to draw them to me?

Try to remember back when you were all 18 to 21 year old girls again. If you heard about how some guy spent his weekend, what would make you say, "wow, he sounds really cool. I want to hang out with that guy"?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-27-2004
Fri, 03-23-2007 - 5:40pm
I give up on trying to help. You obviously are misunderstanding my posts and not getting the main points of it. I wish you luck but I've been running around in circles trying to give advice that's not being taken.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
Fri, 03-23-2007 - 5:45pm

I think Redon needs to go back and re-read post #27 in this thread. It is, by far and away, the best advice he's been given.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2006
Sun, 03-25-2007 - 4:04am

Perfect response julles,

I am currently in this age group....well maybe a couple years older but I am around those girls enough to know that julles is right on with her advice. Hot girls in college are simply shallow and thats all....and even when they find the hot guy they like they spend their time talking about how they're disappointed in them because they're not Orlando Bloom, Brad Pitt, Johnny Depp, etc. etc. etc.

I am talking about the girls you see in girls gone wild videos who would put out if someone would give them an extra beer or tell them they look good or simply because theyre drunk and stupid....

Thats just how they are and if hooking up with girls like that make you feel better then I don't know what to tell you because you're not going to get anything out of it other then another "i got drunk and f***ed this one chick" story to tell your friends. Stop worrying about those kinds of girls...they ARE NOT WORTH IT, trust me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2006
Sun, 03-25-2007 - 2:57pm
Thanks, but honestly, I think we are all just wasting our breath. I am starting to wonder why Redonculous is even on this board. He asks for advice, only to reject every single one that people offer him. He demands answers like we owe it to him or something, and I have yet to see him write “thank you” once to anybody when has taken the time out to reply to his post and sincerely help him. I think he is just bitter and angry at women in general and sees this board as an outlet to vent his frustration. I mean, really, it’s hard for me to imagine that he is that naïve to not realize that he doesn’t have a chance in the world to get a hot girl in college being the way things are for him right now. I, for one, am done trying to help him.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
Sun, 03-25-2007 - 3:58pm
But like I said, I just want to casually hook up. I want someone I can see just 1 night every 2 or 3 weeks or even just once and never again while I move onto someone else. For that, I couldn't care less about a girl's level of confidence, her intelligence, her personality, so why should it matter to her either?


Girls are different than guys. Even girls who are interested in casual hookups want a guy who has at least SOME confidence. Otherwise, there is just nothing sexy there to get our blood pumping enough to want to sleep with him. Regardless of how he looks or what he does.













iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2006
Tue, 03-27-2007 - 8:27pm

>>>Thanks, but honestly, I think we are all just wasting our breath. I am starting to wonder why Redonculous is even on this board. He asks for advice, only to reject every single one that people offer him. He demands answers like we owe it to him or something, and I have yet to see him write “thank you” once to anybody when has taken the time out to reply to his post and sincerely help him. I think he is just bitter and angry at women in general and sees this board as an outlet to vent his frustration. I mean, really, it’s hard for me to imagine that he is that naïve to not realize that he doesn’t have a chance in the world to get a hot girl in college being the way things are for him right now. I, for one, am done trying to help him.<<<

It's not that I'm not thankful that many of you have taken the time to respond. I am, and I've said so in the past.

At the same time, as I have mentioned in the past, I'm frustrated so many replies are telling me to change my goal, things like, "casually hooking up is not that great. You should look for serious relationships," when I keep reinstating that hooking up and having fun is all I want. Like I said, I'm just a young guy. Why should I throw away all my freedom and my chance to have fun and enjoy being young by spending the rest of my life with 1 and only 1 girl?

To those who say "casual sex and hooking up is not that great," you're not a guy. How can you possibly understand men's desire to have sex? Or how frustrating and painful it is especially for a guy who's never had sex before or even come close to being close to a girl?

And I'm frustrated that so many of you just tell me to accept my circumstances and to "just be yourself." "Just be yourself" is the most worthless and couter-productive "advice" you can give to someone. Would you tell a person who's overweight but who wants to work out and get in shape to just accept the way things are and to "just be yourself"? Would you tell a person who has no job or education but who wants to go to school and get a career to just accept the things are and to "just be yourself"? Of course not! So why would you tell it to someone with barely a social life and absolutely no sex life but wants to develope them to do so?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
Wed, 03-28-2007 - 8:46am

I'm frustrated so many replies are telling me to change my goal, things like, "casually hooking up is not that great. You should look for serious relationships," when I keep reinstating that hooking up and having fun is all I want.


(Sigh)

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2006
Wed, 03-28-2007 - 11:10am

>>>Most of us have explained to you repeatedly that it's not something we can "teach" you how to do.

You have repeatedly asked why it is so difficult to find a woman to casually hook up with, and what we were telling you is the REASON it is so difficult is because MOST women want a serious relationship and aren't simply satisfied with FWB.<<<

But from what you all said, ALL of you have made an exception for 1 or 2 guys. So like I said, if very few girls are interested in casual sex, then why can't I be that guy normal girls will try it once with? Why can't you tell me what they did, said, moved, dressed like, etc, that got you to do it?

>>>I'm curious, though...do you have any friends at all? Are they having all kinds of casual hookups? If so, why don't you have them show you the ropes?<<<

Of course I have friends, but only 1 of them has ever had a casual hookup once, and for the same reason I made with a girl only once. We were both drunk. Most of them spend months being single, without a single date or hookup, and then their loneliness and desperation forces them to settle for long relationships with less-than-attractive girls.

I do not want to end up like my friends. I am proud that I've succumbed to settling for someone I'm not attracted to. That gives some confidence.

>>>Since your ultimate goal is sex, then perhaps you should check out the sex boards on iVillage. I don't know that they are going to tell you anything different than we have, but from what you keep saying, our advice to you is not what you're looking for anyway. Why would you keep shopping in the same store if you're not happy with their service?<<<

The sex boards won't help. All they talk about is problems they have DURING sex, but there's nothing there about what to do or say to actually get from stranger-walking-down-the-street TO sex. I come hear because I just want to get an understand of how women feel and think and to use that to my advantage. I don't understand why it's so hard to get answers.

Let me try this. Think about the guy who you had sex with the quickest, as in, the guy you spent the shortest amount of time getting to know before you had sex. What did he do or say to get you to do that? How did you meet? What were the things he said to you? What were the things that he said that you thought were cute, funny, charming, etc? How did he dress? How did he move? Basically, what did he do that got you to abandon your inhibitions about casual sex, even for just a little bit?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
Wed, 03-28-2007 - 11:55am

I've

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 03-28-2007 - 12:19pm

Just lurking around here and have found this thread very amusing. Gotta love the honesty this kid has, but man, the immaturity. I know it was all meant sincerely, but as a hot, formerly 21 year old ;), I wouldn't have touched this guy with a ten-foot pole and the desperation just screams out. Sounds more like a horny 14 year old. And even my 14 year old BF was hot and confident, oh and also willing to TALK to me after sex, and take me out because he realized women were worthy of more than just sex and HE liked it that way. Anyway...I just shook my head through this thread...and laughed.

LOVE your post, countrygrl. Sums it all up. You ladies were so darned patient.

Michelle