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|Sun, 05-04-2003 - 7:59pm|
Two months ago I called off my October wedding. I had several good reasons, and am not regretting it. We had been together for 10 & 1/2 years. He's the only person I've ever been with, starting at 15 years old.
My problem now, which just started this past week, is that I am so incredibly lonely. I can't stop crying and I don't want to be lonely anymore.
I have not started dating yet because I have a problem in that area. I have never ever dated anyone (except for my ex). I am an extremely shy person, I have trouble starting up conversations unless I know that person really well. There have been a few opportunities where I could have started dating, but I screw it up. I am so very scared. I show that guy that I'm interested, then before we can even go out, I freak and don't speak to him again. I think I'm probably coming across as a tease. I do not want that to be like that at all, and I'm afraid that I am. I am so so scared. I don't know why I freak out like that and I don't know how to stop it.
Again, any advice is appreciated...