Man swap

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Man swap
Sun, 03-02-2014 - 1:12pm

No I'm not talking about a swingers party, but 2 thing that happened last night made me think about this.

I was going to a dance and on the way there one friend was saying that last week she had a date with a guy she has known for a while.  She said he's very nice, polite, nice house, etc. but she just doesn't feel a connection to him.  She said she felt that she should bring him somewhere so he could meet her friends and maybe someone else would like him.

Then I went to the dance and was talking to another friend.  She said that she had invited this guy who was a contractor who worked on her office because she found out he had just started taking ballroom lessons.  Then she added, "I didn't want him to think it was a date, so I told him there would be a lot of women for him to dance with.  I hope you'll dance with him, but he might not be that great because he's new at lessons."  Well the guy was good looking, friendly, really nice and a good sport about trying dances he wasn't that familiar with.  I couldn't understand why she was trying to make him see that it wasn't a date, except that she said that she's "happy being single" and doesn't really want a relationship.

Then a 3rd friend has a guy who likes her.  She thinks he is nice but I can see they aren't really a good match.  she's a very religious person who wants to get married again and would not have sex outside marriage.  He's more of a rough around the edges guy, but a good hearted person, but I'm pretty sure he wouldn't go for the no sex idea.  She would like to have him for a dance partner but she doesn't really want to date him--yet he took her out for a nice date and keeps calling her.  I wonder if he thinks that he'll just wear her down.  Most guys would give up with the lack of interest, I'd think.

So on the way home, I came up with the idea that we could have a man swap--you know, all of us could bring a nice guy who we just don't want to date and hope that he will like one of our friends.  Unfortunately I don't think I could find someone to bring to this party--I wouldn't inflict my ex on anyone.  And I don't know if the guys would go for this idea--I'm sure they would have to be told it was just a party.  

Avatar for cfk_3
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-1999
In reply to: musiclover12
Sun, 03-02-2014 - 5:06pm

I went out on one date with a guy from OLD back several years ago . . . he was extremely handsome, about five years younger than myself, quite smart and was a musician.  I don't know what I was thinking but I do remember that his personality was a tad flat.  The following week after we had gone out, I suggested meeting for drinks and purposely tried to kind of push him off on a client of mine.  I know they ended up exchanging numbers but I don't remember if they ever went out.  I know they didn't end up together because she is married to someone else, LOL.  Anyway, my rambling two cents on the topic.  Of course, she didn't return the favor and introduce me to anyone but this is what popped into my head when I read your post.  It's actually a pretty good idea if the guy is okay with it.  I am thinking the guy from my situation was probably no more interested in me than I was in him so it worked out well.  I guess if a guy was really into you he could potentially get hurt by the mere suggestion.