My Single Life (Survey)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
My Single Life (Survey)
23
Tue, 05-23-2006 - 2:08pm

Edited 5/23/2006 2:14 pm ET by cl214

(Ooops, I thought this survey would allow several selections)




Edited 5/23/2006 2:16 pm ET by cl214
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
Thu, 05-25-2006 - 2:05pm

Oh goodness that is so depressing. So basically, we should just be trolling nursing homes looking for a guy willing to commit.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
Thu, 05-25-2006 - 2:08pm

"Honestly, finding a man who truly seemed to care was much easier when I was younger. I don't know if it is because they are consumed with careers or what, but I've run into way too many men lately who just don't seem to desire a relationship or care about how they treat a woman."

I've run into the same problem, except it seemed it was easier before guys got out of college and into careers. Once the prospect of making money came into play, women got kicked aside. How sad is it that I envy my high school aged niece and her friends cause at least they've found boys willing to commit and be boyfriends.

I better tell her to enjoy it while it lasts.

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 05-25-2006 - 3:16pm

Yeah, except we'd have lots of competition, considering how many more women there are in that age bracket than men!!!

Honestly, I sometimes think it's more likely that I'll win the lottery (and I don't even buy tickets, ha!) than find a guy I'm attracted to (and who is attracted to me), who also wants a committed relationship, isn't boring and doesn't have a whole bunch of emotional issues. It really feels like I'd have to be that extraordinarily lucky to have it happen. Yet hope springs eternal and I keep trying ;-) (but I'm on the verge of taking a 90 day hiatus starting June 1--I need a break from this roller coaster!!!).

Sheri

Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 05-25-2006 - 3:50pm

Maybe I'm the exception but dang.. I'm so looking for a committed relationship.

It may be where people are at in their lives as a factor. I have been divorced for 6 yrs and have been looking for the past 5 yrs seriously for a life mate.

Mark (52)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
Thu, 05-25-2006 - 4:04pm
I wish I could see a chart arranged by age, geography, race and desire for a relationship for all of the US grouped by gender. I'm pretty sure I live in an area that is low in monogamy and commitment. I hear it is much better in the midwest and the south. Dang me, for living in such a crappy market!
Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Thu, 05-25-2006 - 4:06pm

I'm in the midwest and am not having any better luck.


I guess we all need to move to the south.


Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 05-25-2006 - 4:11pm

I think that's why we are friends Sheri... but I play the lottery.

I do believe in miracles though.

Hugs
Mark

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 05-25-2006 - 4:12pm

Yes, Mark, you are very much a (good) exception ;-), both in your desire for a committed relationship and in your willingness and ability to deal with any issues and communicate openly about your feelings, etc. I wish there were more men in our age group like you out there, and I'm glad I to have the pleasure of knowing you!!

I don't know that the amount of time a guy has been divorced is a factor...I have met guys who've been divorced for *years* and who have no desire to take on the obligations and responsibilities of a committed relationship--they just want the benefits (and so many women are willing to settle for sex and companionship just so they aren't alone all the time, so these guys really don't *have* to be willing to make a commitment in order to get what they want). Or they are carrying around a whole bunch of baggage and are doing nothing to deal with it...they just move from woman to woman, figuring it's "HER" every single time, not them.

Anyway...sorry, I'm sounding negative. I really don't mean to be...I just am finding out that the latest guy I met (the one who was pursuing me so ardently) definitely has issues that I'm pretty sure make him incompatible with me (he's turning out to be *really* selfish/self-centered), and so I just don't see this working. So it's back to the drawing board for me...except I'm really feeling like I need some time off...so starting June 1, I'll continue to see whoever I've met by that point where there's still mutual interest, but I'm taking down all my profiles and I'm not going to contact anyone or even browse profiles for 90 days.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Thu, 05-25-2006 - 4:46pm
I live in Chicago and it is not any better, but I think I have the urban factor tied in. I do know that in my home town/state, most people marrie right after college or soon after, which is not common at all in Chicago. The opposite is true here. More people are single and wonder why the hell anyone would want to get married that young....
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Thu, 05-25-2006 - 4:50pm

Sometimes taking a break is all you need.... Plus it is the summer, who knows who you will meet in the meantime :)

Try to cheer up!